Easier Seen Than Explained
by Gamer-Otaku Takara
Summary: My life got a bit complicated when my boyfriend turned out to be a lying bastard. You'd think I deserved a break after everything that'd gone down...but the universe didn't seem to think so. It certainly didn't have my best interests in mind when it threw me into a world of magic, elves, demons... I'm Amari, and this is my twisted little story. *Anders/OC* *Slight Sebastian/OC*
1. Chapter 1

7

**Easier Seen Than Explained**

Chapter One: In Which Things Get Complicated.

Rows upon rows of people. REAL people, might I add. Not dummies, or mannequins, or anything else that some weird person might use to practice. And they were all waiting for me.

Whoever said performing would get easier is a damn dirty liar.

I wasn't about to rock out in front of millions of people. I wasn't going to break into a mind-blowing dance sequence, either. No, I was just getting ready to perform a nice, meaningful song for the lovely citizens of a city bar. But did that calm my nerves at all? Nope. Not one bit.

"You're up, 'Mari," my boss called softly.

Well, here goes. If I'm lucky, I won't embarrass myself too much.

I clutched my guitar tightly as I stepped out onto the stage. The spotlight blinded me for a few seconds, but after a few blinks, I could see again (well, as much as my limited vision allowed me to)…which might not have been a good thing. As soon as my eyes landed on the crowd, it suddenly seemed like their numbers had tripled. Uh-oh, here comes my lunch…

_Whoa, now. Vomiting might not be the best decision, if you wanna keep your job…and your dignity._

…My inner self shouldn't have to tell me that.

I took a deep breath. _Okay, Amari, keep it together…just imagine that they're all donkeys. Or your cat. You sing for Socks all the time._ Surprisingly, that made my stomach get out of my throat, and I was capable of coherent thought.

"Hey there, how's everybody doin' tonight?" I said cheerfully into the microphone. A resounding "good" lifted my spirits even further. "Alright! For those of you that don't know me, I'm Amari Benett, and I'll be performing a song for you! Enjoy~"

Another deep breath filled my lungs. My eyes closed at the same time I began to strum my guitar, and my voice (although nice and smooth) rang throughout the room.

"I told you on the day we wed,

I was gonna love you till I's dead.

Made you wait till our weddin' night,

That's the first and the last time I'll wear white."

I opened my eyes. Their faces were starting to lift—I guess they think I'm good. That thought gave me a boost that showed in the volume of my voice…

"So if the ties that bind every do come loose,

Tie 'em in a knot like a hangman's noose.

Cuz I'll go to Heaven or I'll go to Hell,

Before I'll see you with someone else.

"Put me in the ground,

Put me six foot down,

And let the stone say,

'Here lies the girl whose only crutch

Was lovin' one man just a little too much.'

And if you go before I do,

I'm gonna tell the gravedigger that he better dig two."

It seems Lady Luck (or whatever entity you thank for good fortune) was smiling down at me today. The rest of the song went great, and the end brought deafening cheers and ear-splitting whistles…okay, maybe I was exaggerating a little. But there was definitely applause and whistles.

"Amari, my girl! Wonderful performance, I expected no less!" The Boss clapped me roughly on the back, making me yelp a bit. He chuckled. "Sorry, I guess I don't know my own strength." _Ha, no kidding_. "Your paycheck'll come in the mail. You've done well, lass. You earned it."

I felt myself start to grin. I feel like a five-year-old getting told the picture I drew was really good…maybe because it isn't always easy to get The Boss's praise. "Heehee, thanks."

"No problem. Now run on home, lass. It'll be gettin' dark soon." Oh, that's right. Ugh…I hate walking through the city when it's dark out.

"Yes, sir." My Irish employer gave me a smile and a pat on the head as I walked over to my guitar case. After securely encasing my precious instrument, I slid my arms through the straps and sauntered out the door.

You know how I said that I hate walking through the city when it's dark? Well, there's a good reason for that. I am VERY paranoid. If it wasn't for the usual fear of getting mugged or shot, I'd be worried about zombies stumbling out of the shadows, or a rabid animal jumping out and mauling me. Maybe I've seen too many horror movies?

A crashing noise from an alley to my right made me jump. "Jesus…" I took a deep breath and quickened my pace, trying to slow the erratic beating of my heart. C'mon, Amari, home is only a couple blocks away…

"'Bout time you got home."

"Gah!" I yelped when I opened the door, to find Daren sitting on the couch. "Good Lord, Daren! Don't DO that!" I said, setting my guitar against the wall and giving him a half-hearted glare. My reaction made him grin.

"What, did you think I was a robber or something?" He smirked. "You're such a wuss."

I stuck my tongue out like a child. "Shut up, you know I'm skittish at night!" I shut the door behind me and walked over to the couch.

"You're right, you're right. I'm sorry, babe."

I sat next to him and kicked off my shoes, snuggling closer to him. "No you're not. You thought it was hilarious." I pouted.

"Well…maybe a little." Daren laughed when I playfully smacked his arm. Kissing my forehead, he said, "You know I'm just messing with you." I rolled my eyes in mock-indignance.

Did I mention that Daren was my boyfriend? No? Well, now you know. We started dating three years ago.

"How was work?" I asked. Daren shrugged.

"It was…work."

I gave him an "are-you-kidding-me" look. "You know what I mean. Did you have a good day?"

"I guess so, yeah."

"Well, that didn't sound very convincing."

He sighed. "Look, babe, nothing abnormal happened. It was just a normal day at work, alright?" he snapped.

I blinked in surprise, then scowled. "Why are YOU getting so defensive?"

"I'm not!"

I rubbed my temples. Okay, this has got to stop. "You've been awfully touchy lately, Daren. What's up with you?"

"Nothing, I—"

BAMBAMBAMBAM.

Daren was suddenly interrupted by the sound of someone banging on my apartment door. Odd…I wasn't expecting anyone. I got to my feet and walked slowly over to the door. Opening it, I came face-to-face with a pretty, blonde-hair-blue-eyed woman in a tank top and jeans, her expression slightly contorted in an expression of anger. Whoa. Who shit on HER parade? "Can I…help you?" I asked warily.

She scowled at me. "Is Daren Watson here?"

I looked over my shoulder at Daren. His slightly tanned skin had gone pale, his bright green eyes wide and his shaggy brown hair starting to get wet with sweat. My eyes narrowed, and I felt a sinking feeling of dread in my gut. _I have a feeling this isn't going to go down well…_ "Daren, honey…you have a visitor," I said, my tone sickly sweet. I saw his Adam's apple bob as he gulped. Standing up, he plastered an all-too-fake smile on his face and walked up to the Barbie girl.

"D-did you need something?" he stammered. Barbie looked at him in disbelief.

"You're KIDDING, right?!" She turned to me. "Are you aware that your boyfriend is a liar?"

I tilted my head. "…No, I wasn't. Care to elaborate?" I asked, shooting Daren a brief glare.

"Daren and I started dating about a month ago."

I felt all the blood leave my face. "…What?" I asked, my voice nothing but a squeak.

"That's right." Barbie glared at Daren. "I was talking to one of our old, mutual friends, and SHE mentioned that Daren's had a girlfriend for the past three years."

I snapped my attention to the panicking man next to me. "You've been CHEATING on me?!" I yelled, taking a step towards him.

He took a step back. "Amari, baby, I can explain—"

"Don't you 'baby' me! You ASSHOLE! We are SO through!"

Barbie's glare intensified. "So are we, obviously!" With that, she promptly bitch-slapped him and stormed away.

I stared at Daren, my demeanor suddenly becoming eerily calm. "Where's your key to my apartment?" I asked slowly. He silently dug it out of his pocket and placed it in my outstretched hand, sullen. "'Just a normal day at work', indeed…I bet you were working REAL hard, weren't you?" He opened his mouth to respond, but I cut him off by pointing into the hall. "Get the fuck out of my apartment."

With the look of a prideful, wounded beast, he walked out the door.

"Daren, wait." He turned around, looking hopeful, only to be shot down again when my fist connected with his face. "I almost forgot your parting gift," I snarled, before slamming the door in his now-injured face.

After the door shut loudly, I listened for a moment. When I could no longer hear the sound of Daren's footsteps, I sank to my knees, burying my face in my hands and weeping.

I wasn't usually one to cry, mind you. My mom raised me with the belief that crying made you look weak. But this is a special occasion, wouldn't you agree?

Y'know, this whole thing was rather cliché. A girl has a steady boyfriend, they drift apart, he ends up cheating on her with a busty blonde. Funny how you never imagine that those kinds of things could happen to you…


	2. Chapter 2

15

Chapter Two: In Which "Out of This World" Takes on a Whole New Meaning

So, the normal girl reaction to a breakup is to stay home, eat ice cream and watch sad movies, right? Well, I'm no different. I've spent the last three days locked in my apartment, lights off, eating sweets while watching What Dreams May Come over and over. (That movie is the SADDEST thing I've EVER seen, I kid you not.) Even though it's a bit odd watching a movie with only one eye…

Oh, I forgot to mention that, didn't I? Yeah, I'm blind in my left eye. I was born that way, so I'm used to it by now. When I was a teenager, I wore an eye patch over that eye, but I stopped when I was 17. My left eye is really pale blue, almost white (the blindness made it so), and my right eye is a reddish-brown (more red than brown). That, coupled with my long, jet-black hair and pale complexion, made me look badass.

Anyway, it was only a matter of time before someone got concerned about me.

RINGRINGRING!

The shrill cry of my phone's default ring tone made me jump. Pausing the movie, I set down my cookies and hit "Answer", pressing the phone against my ear. "Hello…?'

"You sound terrible."

I rolled my eyes. Grace…blunt as ever. "Gee, thanks."

"I heard about Daren. I always knew he was trouble…I've got my baseball bat sitting right beside me. Want me to…pay him a visit?"

Her dead-serious tone made me grin. "See, this is why you're my best friend."

"Yeah, I'm pretty damn awesome." I heard her sigh. "'Mari, when's the last time you left your apartment?"

I winced. Busted… "Um…three days ago?" At least I've showered.

Grace fell silent. "…Strap your boots on and grab your hiking stick, girl. You're going for a walk."

"Say what?"

"You heard me! No more moping around! There's a forest near the park towards the edge of town. Go take a walk. And take pictures, so I know you were there!"

My mouth hung open. "Wha—but—Grace!"

"Butts are for sittin'! Now, get up off yours and do as I say! Gracie knows best!"

"You sound like my mother…" I mumbled.

"No, if I were your mother, I'd tell you to get a grip and put your big girl panties on." Heh…my mom was a big "appearance-is-everything" person. I miss her… "For God's sake, Amari! You're a 24-year-old woman! You're acting like you're 15!"

I growled. "Alright, alright! I'll go take a damn walk, ya happy now?!"

"Very. Don't forget the pictures~!" With that, Grace promptly hung up.

Geez…Grace was more abrasive than I was. And I'm pretty abrasive.

Seeing no way around it, I shut off the movie, throwing my blanket to the side and standing up. "Stupid Grace…makin' me do stuff…" I grumbled, going into my room to change into something OTHER than PJs.

I dug through my closet for a few minutes, before pulling out the clothes I wanted. I had a pair of dark blue jeans, a gray jacket, and a black spaghetti-strap tank top with the Japanese kanji for strength on the front in bright red. Speaking of which, there's another thing I forgot to mention. I'm half Japanese. My dad was American, so my Japanese blood comes from my mom…I was also raised speaking two languages. Betcha can't guess which ones!

Anyhoo, those clothes were the best hiking clothes I had. Don't look at me like that! I'm not an outdoorsy person! At least I have decent outdoor shoes.

So, I slipped on my gray and purple Nike tennis shoes, grabbed my keys, and walked out the door.

*BAMSCENECHANGE*

I hate the woods during the summer. Not only is it hot outside, there's also an over-abundance of bugs. Ugh, I hate bugs. Especially big ones. And mosquitoes.

Don't get me wrong, summer forests are really pretty. It's just the dangers and the nuisances that get me.

"Stupid, stupid Grace," I muttered, grabbing my guitar case and shutting the door to my little black car. Chances were, I'd stumble upon a clearing, and for all its bug-infested horrors, the forest was still a nice place to practice. It was quiet, unlike the city. "Let's get this over with…"

So began my grueling trek through the woods, using most of my concentration to focus on not getting hit in the face by low-hanging tree branches, and avoiding spider webs and large swarms of flying insects. I hate nature sometimes.

At least it didn't take long to find the previously mentioned clearing. It was actually really pretty. There was a big rock placed conveniently in the middle, and a really tall oak tree right beside it, casting a wonderful amount of shade right over it.

I wasted no time in running over to said rock. As I sat down, I saw that the rock was delightfully cool to the touch, and that was a welcome relief from the hot summer air.

It wasn't long after I sat down that everything suddenly turned dark.

Not pitch black, just…darker, like the shade I was sitting under has suddenly spread over all my surroundings. All the sounds of the forests were abruptly silenced. Even the tree branches were frozen mid-sway.

I stood up, clutching my guitar, just as another phenomenon occurred. Cracks appeared all over, even in midair, and all of them leaked an eerie red light. "Oh my…"

Hey, this is a perfect time to take those pictures Grace wanted! My mouth still open in shock, I took out my camera and snapped a few pictures. I even took some pictures with my phone.

This was…well, impossible, but also incredible! I looked around, hoping someone was nearby that could see it too. Y'know, to make sure I'm not hallucinating. But, as fate would have it, I was all alone with my possible hallucinations.

Well, as long as I was gonna go crazy anyway, I might as well see what these cracks were all about. Squaring my shoulders, I walked over to one of the grounded cracks and knelt down. Reaching out, I brushed my fingertips along it…

Suddenly, the crack became a giant hole beneath me, and my vision went black.

*ANOTHERSCENECHANGE*

Oh dear God, what is that SMELL?

That was my first thought when I finally regained consciousness.

The odor had hit me like a tidal wave, and it was just as suffocating. It smelled like blood and vomit and dead things and WHERE THE HELL AM I?

My eyes snapped open, and I turned my head to the side…coming face-to-face with the most monstrous thing I had EVER seen. It had a grotesque, goblin-like face, with its eyes open wide and its mouth hanging open in a soundless snarl. And sweet-mother-of-all-things-holy, it was DEAD.

I let out an ear-splitting scream and leaped to my feet. Seeing my guitar case laying nearby, I grabbed it and held it to my chest, surveying my surroundings.

Those things were EVERYWHERE.

There were little ones, big ones, BIGGER ones… They all wore some kind of armor, and they were all ugly, and they all STANK. I felt my limbs begin to tremble as I looked around, searching desperately for a way out of this rocky clearing. Panic started to take me over, and then…

I heard a growl.

Please don't be what I think it is, please don't be what I think it is—

Slowly turning around, my eyes landed on the twisted, disgusting figures of…

A group of live ones.

Don't misunderstand, I think the dead ones are simply FOUL, but judging by the jagged, sharp weapons they held and the ravenous look in their black eyes…I think I'd prefer the dead ones.

For every inch they scooted towards me, I scooted an inch back. "H-hey now…can't we talk about this?" I asked shakily. They bared their sharp teeth, snarling. "No? Well, um…" I cast a quick glance over my shoulder, a narrow path suddenly entering my vision. "I hate this…thing I'm late for. Very important thing, y'know. So we'll have to continue this at a later date…SEE YA!" I turned around and bolted down the path, screaming like a banshee. The creatures made no secret about following me, either, with their armor clanking together and their snarls loud enough for me to hear, even with my head start.

"HEEEEELP MEEEEEE!" I yelled, praying that someone was close enough to hear me…preferably with a shotgun.

But, as fate would have it…no such person came to save me. I was a poor little damsel in distress who would have to fend for herself.

I want my prince, dammit!

*Ahem*…Anyway. Back to running for my life.

Or, rather, stumbling. My poor, clumsy foot caught on a rock, sending me sprawling face-first to the dusty ground.

Shit. Shit. SHIT.

_Get up, dumbass, or you're gonna be goblin chow!_

A surprisingly drill sergeant-like voice motivated me to jump up (still tightly gripping my guitar) and dash away even faster. That didn't make much of a difference, though…looking over my shoulder, I let out a yelp when I discovered that the creatures were right on my heels.

I was almost out of breath, and my throat and muscles burned from the effort of sprinting so much. Fear caused adrenaline to course through my veins, but that didn't help much. Since I was so distracted…

I didn't notice the cliff until it was too late.

When the ground disappeared beneath my feet, my mind didn't even register that I was falling until I saw a group of people below me. When it finally registered in my mind, I squeezed my eyes shut and yelled, "LOOK OUT BELOW!"

They probably didn't hear me, though, because none of them moved. After a few moments of soaring through the air, my body crashed painfully into something else. It wasn't the ground. If it was, I'd either be dead or in extreme agony.

Keeping my limited gaze trained forward, I used my right hand to feel what was below me. I stopped when my hand touched something soft.

"Can you please get your hand off my face?" (*A/N: What did you THINK it was? Pervert. Geez.*)

I jumped when something moved against my palm, a muffled voice speaking to me with annoyance. Pulling my hand back, I turned my head—

And came face-to-face with a man.

"Eeek!" I squealed and rolled off my human cushion, scooting far enough away to have my back resting against the cliff face. The previously-mentioned man groaned in pain and sat up, rubbing his back.

"Where in the Maker's name did YOU come from?" he asked, looking irritated as he cracked his neck. _Who the hell is the Maker?_

"I…uh…" I looked up at the cliff I fell from, not at all surprised to see the group of creatures standing close to the edge, looking down at me with glares full of rage. A shiver ran down my spine. Ironically, that cliff saved my life.

The man followed my gaze, irritated expression softening into one of understanding. "Darkspawn. Now it makes sense…" _Really? Then could you explain it to me? _"What's your name?"

"A…Amari. Amari Benett," I said softly, the shock of previous events sapping any sass I may have put into my response.

"Odd name…" The man tilted his head, looking at me curiously. "My name is Garrett Hawke. Don't worry, you're safe now. We won't let those darkspawn touch you."

I looked at him with an expression of pure confusion. "Darkspawn…is that what those things are called?"

Garrett frowned. "What?"

"Hawke, look at the way she's dressed. I don't think she's from around here," commented a ginger-haired woman that stood nearby.

_Look at the way I'M dressed?!_

I took a moment to observe the group before me. Besides Garrett and the ginger-haired woman, there was a VERY short, blonde-haired man with a brown leather jacket, a shirt that showed off his vast amount of chest hair (is it even POSSIBLE to have that much chest hair?), and a fancy-looking crossbow; and a dark-skinned woman with black hair, a bandana, pierced lip, two daggers, and clothes that were a bit…revealing. Garrett wore a sort of vest that almost looked like it could be bulletproof, a pair of brown trousers, and he had some sort of bladed staff lying beside him. He had black hair, a small beard, blue eyes, and a line of red—was that BLOOD?—going across his nose. The ginger-haired woman wore a suit of silver and faded orange metal armor, with a headband on her head and a shield and sword on her back.

I was the most normal-looking out of ALL of them!

"Where am I?" I asked.

"You're on the outskirts of Kirkwall, near an entrance to the Deep Roads," Garrett replied, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. After a moment of me staring at him blankly, he blinked at me. "Y'know, Kirkwall. The Free Marches? …Thedas?"

I frowned deeply. "Yeah…nope, not ringin' a bell." I paused. "…Who ARE you people?"

Garrett perked up, as though he had just remembered something. "Oh, right. Amari, this is Aveline Vallen, Varric Tethras, and Isabela." He gestured from the ginger-haired woman, to the short man with the chest hair, to the pirate-like woman with the hooker-ish clothes.

"Pleased to make your acquaintance, milady," Varric said, with a smirk and a deep bow.

"Um…you too," I said, surprised.

"I don't know where you're from, but I REALLY hope you'll be sticking around," purred Isabela, a grin stretching across her face.

"Th…thanks? I guess…"

Garrett chuckled. "Don't let Isabela scare you." He leaned forward. "So, if you don't know where you are, how did you get here?"

Would he believe me if I told him that a giant hole swallowed me up and plopped me in the middle of a field of mostly-dead monsters? Pfft. Like hell he would. So, I decided to lie…well, somewhat. "I don't know," I said with a frown.

"Do you remember where you came from?"

"I…um…kinda?" I replied.

"I see…" Garrett stared at me intently. "Amari…do you have a problem with apostates?"

"That depends," I said, looking at him warily. "What the hell is an apostate?"

He blinked. "You're…kidding, right?" I gave him a blank stare, and he sighed. "You don't remember much, do you? An apostate is an 'illegal' mage. Or, a mage who was lucky enough not to be locked in that prison people call the Circle."

Oh God. They have MAGIC, too?! It's like I'm in another world or something!

…Wait.

That's exactly it, isn't it? That strange phenomenon in the park somehow brought me to a different world!

"Kuso," I hissed.

"Eh?"

I looked at Garrett. "Oh, sorry. No, I don't have a problem with apostates."

Garrett smiled. "Good." He stood up, extending his hand to me. I took it, and he pulled me to my feet. _Well, hello muscles._

"Uh…here, Angel. I believe this is yours." Varric held something out to me.

I was too surprised to be confused by his nickname for me. In his hands, Varric held out my guitar case. "It's…not broken!" I exclaimed, after checking inside it.

"It fell down with you—I was just lucky enough to catch it," he said with a wink.

"Thank you SO much!" I cried happily, hugging it to my chest.

"Y'know, Amari…" I looked at Garrett as he started to speak. "Since you're lost and all, why don't you come stay with me and my family? I'm sure Gamlen won't mind."

I looked at him as though he had grown a second head. "Um…sorry, but I'm not that type of girl."

Garrett stopped, then his eyes widened. "Oh! No, no! Maker, I didn't mean it like that! You obviously have no where to stay, so I was just thinking that I could offer you my home as an…inn, of sorts. I could try and help you get back, when you remember where you're from."

My eyebrows shot up. "Really?" He nodded. _Aw. What a nice guy. _"Well, if you're sure I won't be any trouble…I think I'll take you up on that offer. Thank you, Garrett."

"You're welcome." Garrett smiled warmly. "Welcome to the Hawke family, Amari."

DUN.

DUN.

DUN.

(*A/N: Hey there, guys! I'd just like to take a few moments to acknowledge the people who have followed my story so far! I didn't think I'd get story followers so early in its publication, and it makes me very happy! ^-^ Also, I'd like to give a special thanks to **Musicalrain**, the very first reviewer of Easier Seen Than Explained! Your review really boosted my confidence, thank you very much! Well, that's it for now. Sayonara!*)


	3. Chapter 3

20

20

Chapter Three: In Which I Meet a Blonde-Haired Angel.

And so began my life with the Hawkes. After Garrett brought me to his home in Lowtown (apparently, there's different "levels" of Kirkwall—Hightown, Lowtown, and Darktown), he introduced me to his family: his mother, Leandra, his brother Carver, and his uncle Gamlen. Leandra was delighted to have me stay with them, while Carver was indifferent, and Gamlen…well, let's just say he was irritated. And an ass. After Garrett told them of my "amnesia", though, Carver and Gamlen softened up a bit. A tiny bit.

During the first few weeks of my arrival, Garrett took it upon himself to be my personal tutor, guardian, and guide. We had grown pretty close over the short time I've been in Thedas…probably because I trusted him the most, so I relied on him the most. He protects me like I'm truly a part of his family, and for that, I'll always be grateful to him. I have been feeling awfully homesick, though…I'd really like to find out how I got here, and how to get back, but it's not like I can just waltz up to Garrett and be like, "Oh, by the way…I haven't lost my memory at all, I just told you that because I'm from a different world and I didn't want you to think I was crazy. Whoops, too late."

Anyway, he taught me all about Kirkwall (and how deadly it can be to walk around unarmed), mages, the Templars (who hunt and contain mages), and other things. They had ELVES here, y'know. Not the little, happy ones you imagine building toys in Santa's workshop…they weren't much shorter than the average human, and I don't think I've seen a single one that was happy. They live in a segregated area called the Alienage, and it's super small and looks poorly built. I guess people don't discriminate against skin colors here…they discriminate against elves. And mages, and Qunari. Oh, don't even get me STARTED on Qunari. Have you ever seen one of those things? If not, count your blessings. Those things are fuckin' SCARY. All of them are 6 foot tall or taller, they've got gray skin, and HORNS. I can understand why a lot of people call them "oxmen"…and they're so SERIOUS. They have these permanent scowls on their faces, like the entire world is just…disdainful. Oh, and did I mention that there are dwarves here, too? Varric is a dwarf. I guess most dwarves live underground, in a giant city called Orzammar.

Garrett also took it upon himself to find me a combat trainer. I hadn't shown any signs of being a mage, so he had to find someone reliable that could train me in a different field. Taking my…abrasive nature into account, he thought I would make a good warrior. The problem with that is…I could barely lift a mace, let alone a shield or those BIG ASS swords, hammers, and axes those two-handed-type warriors use. And the ARMOR. Holy mother of cheese, warrior's armor is MASSIVE. And it looks so UNCOMFORTABLE. So, after a bit of debating, I convinced Garrett to let me train in archery. Rogue's armor is light, bows don't take much effort to lift, and I wouldn't be in the middle of battle, like I would be if I were using daggers. I would still need to do some training to get my arms stronger (so I can actually draw the bow), and increase my speed and stamina.

And so I did. Garrett assigned Varric as my trainer. I've been training with him for a couple weeks, so I was nowhere near ready to hold my own in a big fight. …Which was why I was so surprised when Garrett asked me to come on a quest with him.

*SCENE CHANGE*

"Hey there, 'Mari."

I looked up when Garrett walked into Varric's room in the Hanged Man. This was after one of our training sessions, so we were just relaxing and having a few drinks. Well, I was. Varric probably ordered half of their alcohol supply…I can't imagine why, though. The alcohol here tastes horrible, I can only tolerate a few drinks at a time…and I only do that because all this craziness makes me crave anything with alcohol in it. "Somethin' you need, Gare?" I wondered.

"I was just thinking…you haven't been out of Kirkwall since you got here, and you can defend yourself well enough…" He grinned. "How would you like to go on a little quest with me?"

I blinked. "Me? Really?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah. I could use an archer, and…" Garrett glanced at Varric. I couldn't see him (he was on my blind side), but I assume he looked a bit tipsy. "Varric's a bit busy. Besides, I haven't got to follow you around lately."

I giggled. "You sound like Aveline." I picked up my longbow and slung my quiver of arrows over my shoulder, so it lay securely on my back. "I'd love to come along. From what I hear, you get into all SORTS of trouble." I smiled up at him (he was a bit taller than me). "Lead the way, big brother."

He grinned. "I feel like flying every time you call me that." He patted my head. "It's good to have a little sister again." Yeah, they kind of…adopted me. Since I have the Hawkes' dark hair and reddish-brown eyes (well, eye), everybody assumes we're related. They even call me "Miss Hawke". Even I forget that my real last name is Benett, sometimes. Garrett's words made me a bit sad, though…he used to have a REAL little sister. Her name was Bethany, and I'm pretty sure she was close to my age. She was killed by an ogre (which is a GIANT darkspawn) when the Hawkes were travelling from their hometown of Lothering (in the country of Ferelden) to Kirkwall.

"Alright now, before we go, I think I should probably warn you about something." I tilted my head, waiting for Garrett to continue. "I'm bringing another person along with me—" He usually brings three people at a time. Odd. "—and he's not always…agreeable."

"I take it this is a friend I haven't met yet?" The dark-haired man nodded. "If he's not agreeable, then why are ya bringin' 'im?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

He smiled sheepishly. "Well, let's just say he's unique."

"Ain't everyone in your merry band of misfits?" I grinned, making Garrett chuckle. "He can't be too bad. Let's go, so I can meet this UNIQUE fella."

"You've been warned. C'mon, then, he's waiting outside." Garrett extended his arm, and I hooked my own through it.

"What a gentleman," I said teasingly as he led me towards the door.

He wasn't kidding when he said this person was unique. As soon as we stepped out of the tavern, Garrett and I were met with the sight of an irritated-looking man. He was an elf, with snow-white hair that looked spiked at the ends, tanned skin, sharp green eyes, and a lanky-yet-muscular build. He wore some kind of spiked armor, and he had a beautiful, pale blue tattoo design trailing from under his bottom lip, to his arms, and probably the rest of his body. From the looks of the giant sword on his back, he was a warrior. And he didn't have shoes…

"I'm surprised you haven't taken off yet," Garrett said humorously. The tension between the two was so thick; you could practically cut it with a knife.

"I owe you a debt, Hawke," the elf said monotonously. "And I will repay it, even if it means having to work with a mage." I take it this one's a mage-hater? Odd that he's agreed to accompany one…and what's this about a debt? I'll have to ask Garrett about it later.

"There's so much love here. It's very comforting," I said sarcastically, giving them a cheeky grin. The elf turned his attention to me, as though he were just now realizing I was there. _How flattering._

Garrett cleared his throat. "Right, um…I'd like you to meet the newest member of the Hawke family. Fenris, this is Amari. Amari, meet Fenris," he said gesturing from the elf to me.

I gave him a "peace" sign and another grin. "Nice to meetcha!" Fenris gave me a curt nod. _Not very social, are we?_

"I don't suppose you would happen to be another mage," muttered Fenris, looking at me through narrowed eyes.

I half-smiled. "Nope. You must be so disappointed," I teased.

He scoffed. "Hardly."

Garrett shook his head. "Let's move on, shall we? Aveline's waiting for us at the ambush site." Oh, so we're stopping an ambush? How fun. I hope I don't get shot…

*CHANGE OF SCENERY*

I have been EXTREMELY unlucky lately. The universe must really hate me, because—wouldn't you know it—I got shot. In the shoulder. With a poison-tipped arrow. Those highwaymen must have been into the cruel-and-unusual if they were planning on using poisoned weapons on a caravan of innocents.

It happened soon after we met up with Aveline. She was standing behind a giant rock, dressed in her usual guardsman uniform, the same one that she wore when we first met.

"Hawke. I almost started to think you weren't going to come," Aveline said.

Garrett grinned. "Oh, Aveline, you know I'd never leave you."

Aveline laughed softly and shook her head, turning around. "Indeed. Anyway, the highwaymen arrived here half an hour ago. They haven't noticed me, thank the Maker, but I've been using all of my self-restraint to keep myself from going out there and killing all of them."

I blanched. "Wait. We're gonna KILL them?" I asked faintly. Please, God, don't tell me I've been thrown into a world of murderers.

Garrett gave me a strange look. "Of course we are. How else do you deal with criminals?"

My jaw dropped. "Uh, you ARREST them?"

"They would kill us before we could say the words, Amari. They've killed and stolen from countless people. Trust me, this is the best way to handle this," Aveline said, trying to reassure me.

I looked at them as though they had all grown a second head. "That's insane! Why not just get a bunch more guards and apprehend 'em? Killing them is a bit much, no matter what they've done, don'tcha think? Where I'm from, we give every criminal a fair trial, and the death penalty is only used in EXTREME cases."

Garrett chuckled. "Well, your home must have been FAR away from here. We don't use that system." He half-smiled. "I hope you remember where you're from soon. I'd really like to visit that place sometime, it sounds interesting."

Fenris facepalmed. "Hawke…you brought along a woman that not only has amnesia, but has also never killed before?" he asked, giving Garrett an irritated look.

Garrett grinned sheepishly. "Well…yeah."

"Focus, you three," Aveline sighed. "This ambush won't be here forever."

"Right, sorry. Go on, Aveline," Garrett said.

"As I was saying…we should confront these men now, before they have the chance to leave or call for reinforcements. I'd like to get this done and report to Captain Jeven," continued the ginger-haired guardswoman.

"Alright then." Garrett ruffled my hair. "Don't worry, sis, I won't make you kill anyone. Just…cripple them or something, and we'll take it from there."

"Okay, but it still doesn't feel right," I mumbled as we stepped into the clearing.

Looking back, it should have been common sense for an archer to seek higher ground, instead of stepping right into the middle of the fight. I must have left part of my brain on Earth, though, because I walked into that wide-open area without a second thought. Not long after, a swarm of highwaymen swooped down upon us, and the battle began. I even managed to land a few arrows in the arms or legs of a couple of the bandits, but I'm pretty sure that was the result of a rare stroke of luck. I'm TERRIBLE at shooting fast-moving targets. Anyway, I was so immersed in the battle; I didn't even see that arrow coming. I only noticed it because of the immense pain it caused as it lodged itself deep into my shoulder, the poison taking immediate effect and making me drop like a rock.

And so, here I am. Dazed out of my mind, both from the blood loss—the arrow was still in my shoulder—(I swear, that arrow was MADE to make people bleed profusely) and from the poison. What do they PUT in that stuff, anyway? Morphine? Heroin? Some other Thedas drug I've never heard of? Whatever it was, it made me dizzy and blurred my vision beyond all comprehension. And I could still feel the pain of it throughout my entire body.

"_Venhedis_, woman, stop squirming!" a deep, familiar voice growled at me. "If you keep thrashing about in my arms, the bleeding will worsen and the poison will spread even faster!"

_Is that Fenris? Am I really in his arms, thrashing? I didn't even notice. Hmm…_

"Keep still. We're almost to that damn mage's clinic," he murmured.

After a few moments, a new voice reached my ears. "Yes, what—oh, it's you. What do you want?" This person was obviously a dude, but he sounded irritated, almost exhausted.

"This woman was shot. Heal her," Fenris said sharply, holding my body towards the stranger. I heard the muffled sound of footsteps, and I was placed on something hard. It kinda hurt my back.

"This arrow is in there pretty deep…oh go away, would you?!" the stranger snapped at Fenris, and I heard a scoff and the sound of footsteps as he walked away. "Alright, now…hello? Miss? Can you hear me?"

_Is he talking to me? I like this guy's voice. It's very smooth and comforting. Like honey._

I heard a chuckle. "You're conscious…off your rocker, but conscious." _Oh, did I say that out loud?_ There was a pause. "I need to get this arrow out. It's going to hurt—a LOT—but I need you to bear with me. On the count of three, then…" He took a deep breath. "One…two…three!"

As soon as he said "three", I felt the arrow being ripped from my flesh, sending a wave of agony throughout my body. I let out a scream, and the stranger pressed something against my shoulder.

"The pain will fade soon, I promise," he said softly. A bright blue light filled my blurred vision, and (just as he promised) the pain started to fade, until it was nothing but a dull throb in my shoulder.

My vision cleared a bit, enough so I could see my savior's face. He had dirty-blonde hair (some of it tied back into a small ponytail), soft amber eyes, and a bit of stubble on his jaw and chin. From what I could see, he wore some kind of long coat, with gray feathers on the shoulders. _Whoa. He's really handsome…is he some kind of angel?_

He chuckled again. "'Handsome', am I? And no, I'm not an angel. Last time I checked, anyway."

_Oh. Damn. Did I say that out loud, too?_

I blinked several times, my vision finally clearing up all the way. The more defined this man's features became, the more handsome he was to me. _Be still my heart._ I slowly sat up, shaking my head to try and rid it of its muddled-ness. "Son of a…batch of cookies…" I muttered, rubbing my temples. Looking around, I found myself to be in a strange room, with the same rugged walls I saw in Darktown, some rocks here and there, and several people laying on cots, either injured or dead. _Uh…ew. Why does he keep DEAD people around? They're such a bore. And they have TERRIBLE hygiene. _All in all, this place looked…well, poor would be a vague description, but that about sums it up. "Where am I?" I frowned. "And where'd Fenris go?"

"That bastard? Maker knows where he went," the man scoffed. I'm sensing a little hostility, here…could it be that my new favorite grouchy elf has made an enemy out of ANOTHER mage? Imagine that. "And, to answer your first question, you're in my clinic. …In Darktown, if you haven't noticed." Ah. I knew I recognized the unmistakable stench of the Undercity.

"I see…" I tilted my head, looking at him curiously. "And you are…?"

"Where are my manners?" The stranger extended his hand to me…which was covered in what I assumed was MY blood. Hopefully. Noticing this, he quickly grabbed a towel that was laying on the cot near me, wiped off his hand, and then offered me his other one. Looking a bit embarrassed as he did so. "My name is Anders. Nice to meet you."

I shook his outstretched hand with a smile. "Likewise. It's good to know the name of my savior…" I grinned. "Amari's the name, getting shot is my game…apparently." My humor was rewarded with a soft chuckle. "Y'know, I think Big Brother mentioned you…you're the ex-Grey Warden healer, who's a strong fighter for the mages' plight, right?"

Anders blinked in surprise. "I am. Who is 'Big Brother'?"

I laughed. "Oh, sorry. You'd know him as Garrett Hawke."

"Hawke?" Anders tilted his head slightly. "How do you know him?"

I smiled sheepishly. "He and his family…adopted me, I suppose you could say, a few weeks ago. Due to my…exceptional circumstances."

"What kind of—"

"Amari!" Anders was interrupted as Garrett burst into the clinic, a wild look about him.

"Speak of the devil," I mused.

"Are you alright? That wound looked nasty, did Anders heal it up right?" Garrett asked frantically, sauntering over and grasping my shoulders, looking me over with a serious expression.

I giggled. "I'm fine, Gare, Anders did a wonderful job." I gave the healer a smile, which he returned. "More importantly, did you and Aveline take care of those highwaymen? Sorry I made you guys do it yourselves."

"It's not as though you could have taken yourself here," said a new voice. I turned to see Aveline standing in the doorway, a brooding Fenris standing next to her.

"I suppose not…" I rubbed the back of my neck. "Speaking of which…" I grinned at Fenris. "Thanks for bringing me here. I'm sure it wasn't easy, if I was thrashing about as much as you told me I was."

Fenris glanced at me out of the corner of his eye, and I swear I saw the corners of his lips lift. "You're welcome…and yes, you were thrashing about quite a bit. You were delirious, though, so the amusement I got out of your incoherent ramblings was worth it."

I felt my cheeks heat up in embarrassment. "Was I really rambling?" When he nodded, I groaned, covering my reddened face. "How embarrassing…"

"Not to interrupt…" I turned to Anders as he began to speak. "But I noticed something peculiar as I was healing you, Amari."

I frowned. "Well, I'm a peculiar person…what'd you notice?"

"When I'm healing someone, I can usually sense the different parts of a person's body, and see where they need to be healed…" Anders raised an eyebrow at me. "But for some reason, I couldn't sense the area around your left eye at all."

That caught the others' attention. "Come to think of it," Aveline began. "That arrow was shot from someone in the area to your left. You should have been able to see that clearly, but you didn't even flinch until it hit you."

"And your left eye is a very odd color…" mumbled Fenris. Well, look who's gettin' chatty all of a sudden.

I winced. "Ah…yeah, about that…" I pursed my lips and turned my head away. "I'm kind of…half blind."

"WHAT?!" Garrett and Aveline exclaimed. Anders nodded, like he suspected it all along, and Fenris looked a bit surprised.

Then, Anders gave Garrett a strange look. "Amari has been living with you for several weeks, and you didn't realize she was half blind?"

Garrett threw his hands in the air. "It's not like she ACTED like she was blind in one eye!"

I smirked. "You know a many half blind people, do you?" He huffed. "Don't feel bad, Big Brother. I'm pretty good at hiding it—I've been this way since I was born, after all. It's pretty easy to keep this kind of thing a secret if you've lived with it for twenty-four years."

Garrett sighed, looking at me with a mixture of concern and guilt. "Why didn't you TELL me, 'Mari? I wouldn't have made you learn to fight if I had known!"

I scowled. "That's exactly WHY I didn't tell you! Whenever people find out about my condition, they treat me differently, and I hate it!" I took a deep breath. "I'm sorry I kept such a huge thing from you, but can you blame me? I've had people treat me like I was mentally retarded, because they were too ignorant to tell the difference between a mental disability and a physical one. There are people that avoid me, and ignore me, and are just plain awkward around me—even BEFORE they know the nature of my different eye colors! Because they think it's CREEPY! I just wanted to feel normal, y'know?" I stared at Garrett with a desperate expression. "You and your family gave me that. You didn't treat me differently, and I loved you all for that."

Garrett gave a deeper sigh. "…You're right. I'm sorry, Amari, it's just…after Bethany…" He ruffled my hair with a sad look in his eyes. "You're the only little sibling I've got, that I can actually show affection to." Heehee. Carver would HATE it if Garrett showed him the affection he showed me. He'd probably punch Garrett. I'd pay to see that… "So…maybe I'm a bit overprotective. Sorry."

I smiled. "Ya don't gotta apologize. I don't mind your overprotectiveness. It makes me happy, actually…I just don't want you to treat me differently 'cause I'm half-blind."

"You've fooled all of us by showing that you can do anything just as good as anyone else…You don't have to worry about that. Trust me," he said reassuringly.

"Hawke…" Aveline put a hand on her armored hip. "I hate to intervene in this touching moment, but Captain Jeven won't be in his office forever."

"Ah, right." Garrett rubbed the back of his head. "I have to go…do you wanna come along, Amari, or…?"

I snorted. "A trip to a room full of biased guards who are easily bought? I think I'll pass." I paused. "…No offense, Aveline."

"None taken."

"Where will you be while I'm gone? Uh, just for verification," said my magical foster brother.

"Um…" I thought for a moment. Was there really any place in Kirkwall I actually WANTED to be? Pfft. "Well, I'll try to decide. Let's go down the list here: Hightown's full of rich, 'I'm-better-than-you-because-I-have-more-money' snobs; Lowtown's dirty and it smells like crap and desperation; Darktown's DIRTIER, and it smells like sewage, hopelessness and crushed dreams; the Docks are full of dirty pirates that probably have more diseases than a bard has stories; and the Gallows…well, the name itself is reason enough to stay away, but it's also full of holier-than-thou Templars who think they can do what they want 'cause they've got a fancy uniform, giant, oppressive slave statues, emotionless Tranquil mages that freak the shit outta me, and regular mages that depress me more than the slave statues and the homeless people in Darktown."

Garrett blinked. "Well…when you put it that way…"

Anders chuckled. "Don't worry, Hawke. Amari is more than welcome to stay here, if she wants." He smiled at me. "We're in Darktown, and it's not COMPLETELY clean…but it's cleaner than most of the places you'll find around here."

I looked at Garrett, pleading with my eyes for him to let me stay. Anders seems like a really nice guy (those are hard to come by, especially in Thedas), plus…he's a mage. A HEALING mage. Garrett's a worthless healer…and, Anders is easy on the eyes. You can't go wrong with that.

"I suppose there's no harm in it. I'm sure you guys can come up with all sorts of horrible ways to rid the world of the Templars together." Garrett laughed. "Fenris, are you coming or staying?"

Fenris looked at him like he was crazy. "Do you really have to ask?"

"Coming it is, then." He pinched my cheek, as though I was a small child. "I'll be back later. Try not to bug Anders too much, eh?" I puffed out my cheeks. "Heh heh, just kidding. Have fun, kiddo."

"Yeah, yeah…"

"Take care of her, Anders," Garrett said, waving as he, Fenris, and Aveline turned and walked out of the clinic.

I sighed. "Honestly…he's only gonna be gone for like, a half hour. At the most."

Anders laughed. "It's nice to see Hawke so happy. He's always cheerful, but there are times when his smiles don't always reach his eyes."

I grinned slightly, swinging my legs back and forth from my perch on the cot. "I'm happy that I make him happy."

"So…" Anders leaned against a pillar behind him. "What was it you were saying about the 'holier-than-thou Templars'?"

I perked up. "You hate them too?"

He smirked. "I'm a mage. What mage DOESN'T hate the Templars?"

I shrugged. "Point taken. Y'know, where I'm from, if there were people like them…well, they'd be arrested for police brutality. Though, they're not technically policemen…"

"I don't understand…what are police?"

"Oh, sorry. That's what we call our…guards, back home. I'm not from around here, if you couldn't tell." I gestured to my "outlandish" clothes. Yes, I've worn the same outfit for three weeks. I've washed it, don't worry! I don't feel like wearing the whore-ish or the old lady-ish dresses that the women wear here.

"Do they have a Circle where you're from?" Anders wondered.

I scoffed. "There aren't even MAGES where I'm from."

Anders' eyes widened. "You're kidding." I shook my head, and his eyebrows shot up. "So…what do you know of the mages' plight?"

"Not much, besides the fact that the Templars bully the mages pretty harshly," I said with a shrug.

"You don't know the HALF of it," Anders grumbled. "I was a Circle mage once, you know."

"Really? How'd you escape?" I asked eagerly.

"I attempted to escape seven times, but I actually got away with it when I was recruited by the Grey Wardens," he replied. Grey Wardens…Garrett mentioned them before. They're people that have mastered the taint (or plague) caused by the darkspawn, and use it to fight them. "But that's not the point. As soon as someone shows signs of having magic, they're torn from their families and thrown in the Circle, no matter how old they are. In the Circle, mages can never leave, and are under the constant supervision of the Templars." His expression darkened. "Templars abuse the mages they claim to protect, and they don't even get punished for it! People fear what mages can do, so they imprison them. It isn't right to lock someone up simply for being born a certain way! Magic is a gift given by the Maker, and if mages were treated right, they wouldn't feel the need to turn to blood magic."

I felt tears come to my eyes. _He sounds like he's speaking from experience…with the abuse, not the blood magic. _"Blood magic…that's when a mage makes a deal with a demon, and uses their own blood to amplify their powers, right?"

"Right. Most mages only turn to blood magic because the Templars or other ignorant people back them into corners. They do it out of desperation. If they were free from the abuse and persecution they face today, the world would be so much better! Mages could HELP people, instead of fearing them!" Anders' voice rose with every sentence, until he was almost yelling.

"Like you do," I said. "You heal people around here, right?" He nodded. "How old were you when you were taken to the Circle, Anders?"

"I was twelve," Anders turned his head away, frowning deeply. "The first time I had shown signs of magic, I accidentally set a barn on fire. My father didn't hesitate to go to the Templars. They came to my house, clapped me in irons, and dragged me to the Circle. The only thing I was allowed to take with me was a pillow my mother embroidered herself…"

I sniffled, feeling the tears coming back. "What an awful thing to do to a child…" I said softly.

Anders glanced at me, startled to see me tearing up. "Yes…well, the Circle isn't ALL bad…" He stared at the ground. "It does teach us to control our abilities…" His eyes flashed. "But to bludgeon us into submission is wrong! And they do it with our blessing!"

I stood up. "You're right." I stared at him, face serious and determined. "You fight for the mages, right?" He nodded again. "Alright, then. Count me in."

His eyes widened. "What?"

"I want to help free them," I insisted.

"…Really?" I grinned and nodded. "Thank you…I'm glad you can see things as I do." Anders looked relieved.

"Hey, was Garrett ever in the Circle?' I wondered.

"No, his father was an apostate. He taught Hawke and his sister how to hide their abilities."

"He wasn't a very good healer, I take it, 'cause Garrett sucks." That made Anders chuckle. "Can you…show me how you heal people? Not just with magic, with medicine and stuff too. I wanna help. You look like you haven't slept in days…having an assistant will do you good."

Oooh, that definitely caught Anders off-guard. "I…yes, I suppose I could use some help…" He gave me a soft smile. "Thank you, Amari. I have only known you for a few minutes, but I can already tell you're a better person than most."

My cheeks heated up. "Heh…I try my best. What can I say?" I rubbed the back of my neck in embarrassment.

Anders' smile widened. "If you really wish to help, you'll have to know how to make poultices, treat wounds…there's usually a lot of blood on the patients. Are you sure you want to be my assistant?"

I winked at him. "Sure as sugar."

"Then, let's get started…"

**_THAT'S_**

**_ALL_**

**_FOLKS!_**

(*A/N: That's right, I've updated this story with two chapters at the same time! :D Oh, and in case you were wondering, "kuso" means "shit" in Japanese. And, I dunno if mages can ACTUALLY see the different areas of a person's body when they're healing them-obviously, I'm not a mage-but I put that in there for the sake of the story. I hope you all are enjoying it so far! ^-^*)


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Good grief. I don't own Dragon Age!**

Chapter Four: In Which I Meet My First…Witch.

I seem to be learning a LOT of new stuff lately. Ever since I dropped into Thedas, it's just been one lesson after another, and I'm still nowhere near understanding this world. I guess the laws and morals of my world make it hard to grasp another's.

Anyway, as you may have guessed, my latest lessons were taught by Anders. I didn't get to stay long for the first lesson (since Garrett came back to get me…I was sad), but I've started stopping by his clinic after my archery lessons with Varric. Anders is a pretty good teacher, and he's very patient. He doesn't get irritated when I mess up, and his instructions are pretty easy to follow. So far, Anders has only been able to teach me how to mix a few poultices and wrap wounds, but he says I've helped him a lot…I worry for him sometimes, though. He doesn't get enough rest. I don't know what he stays up all night doing, but it had better be SUPER important. I don't want my favorite healer to get sick, after all! I wish I could help him out more, but I'm not very far along in my lessons, yet. Anders told me that he gets so many injured refugees—from Ferelden, fleeing the Blight, which is an invasion of darkspawn—that he lost count years ago. I've seen at least forty people come to him seeking aid in the week and a half that I've been coming to his clinic. Do those people work in dangerous places on PURPOSE? I mean, seriously! Eight out of ten of Anders' patients have some kind of life-threatening gash or have a limb cut off or something. It's gross, and horrifying! But, according to Anders, only the most tedious and dangerous jobs will take on Ferelden refugees. People piss me off sometimes. Anders only lets me help with the more…minor injuries. He always takes on the really serious ones. I like him; he's a real sweetheart. He heals everybody for free, did you know that? It's a wonder that guy survives, not getting money from his patients unless they insist…which they can hardly ever afford to.

At any rate…enough of my ramblings. Time to advance my messed-up little story.

Garrett is hardly ever home these days. He's always out doing running some errand or another, helping out pretty much every citizen of Kirkwall that can't fix his or her own problems…which is nearly everyone. When I asked him why he was doing all the things he did, he told me he was trying to save up fifty sovereigns for a trip into the Deep Roads…that number nearly blew my mind. In Thedas, a sovereign is another name for a gold coin, and those are VERY difficult to come by. Each sovereign is worth 100 silver pieces (or just silvers), and each silver is worth 100 coppers pieces (or "bits", as many people tend to call them). So, if a bit was the equivalent of one cent, that would make a silver the equivalent of one dollar, and a sovereign the equivalent of 100 dollars. Get the picture? In Earth terms, Garrett is trying to save up 5,000 dollars to invest in this expedition. I think it's crazy, but he says he'll come back with even more gold than that, and he'll be able to buy back his family's lost estate in Hightown and much more. I sure hope he's right. Brother-Dearest hasn't brought me on any interesting quests since the arrow incident, either. He only brings me along when he's actually running a simple errand (like finding something somebody lost), and refuses to bring me along if he knows he's gonna end up fighting someone. His concern is appreciated, but not necessary…

So, to say I was surprised when he asked me to come to Sundermount with him would be an understatement.

*BAMSCENECHANGE*

"You want me to what?" I gaped at Garrett as he stood before me in Gamlen's tiny house.

Garrett pursed his lips. "I have a…promise that I need to fulfill, and I'd like you to come along."

I folded my arms across my chest, smirking. "So, you've finally come out of your 'overprotective-older-brother' phase, have ya?"

"You said my overprotective-ness made you feel happy!"

"Up until the point where it starts interferin' with my entertainment level," I said pointedly. "I've been so BORED, Gare! When I ain't with Varric or Anders, I have nothin' to DO. The stuff ya usually bring me along for is so utterly dull!"

"…I know, I know. I just don't want you getting hurt again. Mother would KILL me," he sighed. Leandra's such a sweet lady. She's very motherly.

"Well, it's good to see that you've finally come to your senses." I unfolded my arms. "Where're we headed, then?"

"First, we're getting you armor," Garrett said decisively. "Those foreign clothes of yours don't protect you at ALL. I'll feel better about you going into battle again if you've got some protection."

I puffed out my cheeks. "Aww…" I huffed. "Fine, but I ain't wearin' anything that remotely resembles a dress. That goes for skirts, too."

"Deal. Let's go find you some armor, and I'll fill you in on the mission details afterward." Garrett grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the door, only giving me a few seconds to grab my bow and quiver.

"Oi! I can walk on my own, y'know," I said with slight annoyance, shutting the door when we got onto Gamlen's tiny porch-like area. I was surprised to see Anders and Isabela waiting for us at the bottom of the stairs. "Hey there, guys. Long time no see, Isabela."

"No kidding. Hawke tells me you're settling in rather nicely…he also says that you've been spending quite a bit of time with our little healer," she said with a wink. Anders blinked several times.

I raised an eyebrow, shooting Garrett a brief, but dirty, look. "Not really…I've spent more time with Varric than with Anders. What are ya gettin' at…?" I have a feeling I know exactly what she's getting at. Anders is attractive, kind-hearted, and an all-around warm person, but I've only known the guy for a week and a half. Come on, now.

"Oh, nothing. Don't worry about it, kitten," she giggled. She put a hand on her hip. "So, I hear we'll be suiting you up for battle? Good thing you have me along. Men are useless when it comes to fashion."

I laughed. "Ya think so? Well, I won't be the only woman on this trip, at least. I'd hate to be surrounded by a couple'a filthy men," I said dramatically, fake-swooning.

Anders pouted. "Hey, we're not all filthy. Besides, Isabela's probably the dirtiest out of all of us."

Isabela shrugged. "No argument there. Now, come along! All this waiting is making me anxious." She grabbed me by the arm and pulled me along as she sauntered away…luckily, I was quick enough to jump before I ended up tumbling down the stairs.

"Why doesn't anyone think I'm capable of walkin' on my own?!" I huffed, giving Anders a pleading look. "Anders, help me!"

The blonde-haired mage just shrugged, a smirk tugging at his lips. _He's enjoying this! _I glanced at Garrett, hoping to find sympathy from my foster sibling, but he was wearing a full-blown grin. When our eyes locked, he simply whistled and looked away.

"I hate…every single one of you," I muttered.

"You love us and you know it, kitten," Isabela laughed.

"Says you…"

Isabela stopped in front of a merchant's stall in the Lowtown Bazaar. "This looks like a nice enough place to shop." She released my arm (allowing me to rub the offended limb) and pushed Anders and Garrett. "Shoo! You're not allowed to see her until we find the right outfit! Go on, shoo!"

I facepalmed. "We're lookin' for armor, Izzy, not my wedding dress," I sighed. I locked gazes with a startled Anders as he was being pushed away. Giving him an exasperated look and a shrug, he responded with an amused smile. _He has a nice smile…even when he's making fun of me._ When the two men rounded the corner, I turned to Isabela. _Oh no. _She was looking at me with a giant, shit-eating grin. _I have a bad feeling about this. _Nothing good can come from THAT smile.

"Let's get started."

*TIME SKIP*

To make a long story short, Isabela picked out several armor sets that she was sure would look _positively delicious _on me (her words, not mine). Then, before I could even say anything (or, possibly, run away), she shoved me into the back room that the merchant had for trying on armor. I tried on all but one of the sets, and each left Isabela slightly disappointed. There was only one left…let's hope this'll do it. I slipped my limbs through the sleeves and legs, buckling all the buckles, and stepped out of the room so Isabela could judge the outfit. (_What is this, Project Runway?) _And, if the way her expression brightened was any indication, this was The One.

"You look absolutely GORGEOUS," Isabela cried. "Take a look!"

I turned around and faced the tall mirror the merchant had laying against a wall. _Whoa. Is that really me?_

The armor set that I had on had several parts: the black, knee-high boots with the spiked soles and hidden sheathes for small blades, if necessary; the black-and-red lightly-armored skirt (_didn't I say I wanted NOTHING to do with skirts?) _that barely reached my mid-thigh; a skin-tight, low-neck crimson tunic; a pair of fingerless leather gloves with spiked knuckles; and a black vest/short-sleeved-jacket that was made of durable leather, covered with light metal plates, and made to show off my…well, curves. It had swirls of red on the black metal plates, a harness in the back for my bow and quiver, and the V-shaped neck of the outer armor (and the tunic, I suppose) was low enough to almost be embarrassing. _Almost. _All in all, I looked…well, amazingly badass. "Wow…"

"My thoughts exactly." A sly grin made Isabela look like a scheming fox. _Oh dear. _"Anders will be simply SMITTEN when he sees you, kitten." _Hey, that rhymed! Wait a minute…_

"You're not tryin' to play matchmaker, are ya, Izzy?" I asked.

"Oh, come on! You guys would look SO cute together! Besides, he needs someone to help him loosen up. He never has any fun anymore, thanks to that damn spi—" Isabela suddenly stopped herself.

"Um…are you okay?" I asked warily. Isabela immediately grinned. What was she about to say?

"Yep! Now, give me those old clothes of yours and let's show you off! Oooh, I can't wait to see the boys' faces when they see you~!" Isabela stuffed my old clothes into her little bag, hooked her arm through mine and pulled me away, after dropping the merchant his pay of course. "Anders! Hawke! Where'd you run off too?" she called. We rounded the corner they retreated around, and found them standing a few feet away. _Oh God. Please don't tell me they were close enough to hear Isabela's little matchmaking scheme. _If they were, they certainly didn't show it.

As soon as their eyes landed on me, their jaws dropped. Did I see Anders do a double take? Well, now I feel all womanly. "Maker's breath," Garrett said. "Amari, you look…"

"Amazing," Anders finished. I felt heat rise to my cheeks.

"Doesn't she, though?" Isabela slid her arm around my shoulders. "She'd never look this good if I let you MEN help her pick one out. You're welcome."

"I feel kinda…exposed…" I muttered, staring at my feet.

"Oh, don't be such a Chantry sister," Isabela teased. "You should show off a little. You have the body for it! Anders, you agree with me, don't you?"

Anders jumped, as though the question startled him. "I, uh…well, the armor suits her, certainly…" He cleared his throat, face turning red.

She asked him on purpose! That sly little… "Don't ask him that! Jesus, Isabela, where's your shame?" I huffed, smacking her upside the head.

Isabela rubbed her head where I smacked her, grinning. "Honey, I lost my shame YEARS ago."

Garrett facepalmed. "Guys…as amusing as it is to watch Isabela embarrass you two, we should really get moving. I've put this off long enough, the witch shouldn't be kept waiting any longer."

Whoa, hold the phone! Did he just say "witch"? "…I think it's high time ya explained to me what's goin' on, Gare," I said, folding my arms across my chest.

Garrett smiled sheepishly. "Let's walk and talk."

*TIME SKIP*

So, Garrett revealed to me the story of how he met the Witch of the Wilds (the Wilds being the area of dense, untamed forests in the southern region of Ferelden). It was when he, Leandra, Carver, Aveline, and her deceased husband Wesley were escaping Lothering to seek refuge in Kirkwall. Shortly after he killed the ogre that had murdered his sister, they were surrounded by a large group of darkspawn. Just when they were beginning to think they were done for, a dragon suddenly swooped down from a cliff and took out the group in a matter of moments. After the monsters were nice and roasted, the dragon transformed into a woman right before their eyes. Garrett describes the woman as tall and lean, with snow-white hair that was style to look like long, dragon horns, and she wore red and black leather armor with black feathers on the shoulders. He said she had sharp golden eyes with slitted pupils, that seemed like they were staring right into your soul. She also seemed rather…old. After conversing with the witch for a while, she revealed that her name was Flemeth. She promised to get them safely to the city of Gwaren, where they could take a ship to Kirkwall…as long as Garrett promised to do something for her in return. She had given him a strange amulet, and told him to bring it to a Dalish clan on Sundermount. There, he would need to speak with their Keeper, and do whatever she told him to with the amulet. Dalish…I believe the Dalish are clans of elves that wander the wilderness, living by their own laws and traditions. I also heard that they have a strong hatred of humans. I hope this doesn't end with someone dying.

And, here we are. On Sundermount. Gosh, this mountain was CREEPY. The air was stifling, and I keep getting the feeling that someone is watching us.

"Amari?" Anders' voice pulled me from my thoughts. "Are you alright?"

I rubbed my arm, which was starting to get goose bumps. "Yeah, I'm fine." I pursed my lips. "Does this place creep you out, too?"

Anders chuckled. "A bit, perhaps. I'm sure it's nothing." He put his hand on my shoulder in a gesture of reassurance.

The area on my shoulder that his hand was resting on started to tingle…and from the way he started blinking, he felt it too. _How peculiar. _His hand remained on my shoulder for a few extra moments, before he pulled away.

"Come on, you two," Garrett called, a few feet ahead of us. "You're gonna get left behind!"

Anders smiled at me. I'm telling you, that damned smile of his can melt the heart of any woman! It could be a weapon of mass destruction if he used it right. "We shouldn't keep Hawke waiting. Let's go." He started to walk away, leaving me fast-walking to catch up with him.

Within a few feet of the Dalish camp, we were attacked by giant spiders. Yes, you heard correctly. GIANT. SPIDERS. Not "giant" as in the size of a meatball—that kind of "giant" I could handle. No, these spiders were the size of a motherfuckin' CAR. I mentioned before how much I LOATHE bugs, right? Well, you can imagine how I reacted.

"HOLY FUCK ON A SANDWICH!" I screamed, as one of the massive arachnids landed directly in front of me. I turned around and darted away to a safe distance, so the spiders wouldn't feel the need to go after me first. I whipped out my bow, notching an arrow as shooting the spider in the head. "DIE, BITCHES, DIE!" I yelled, firing more arrows in rapid succession. Each of them landed in a different spider in the group of five…although a few of them almost hit Isabela, as she wailed on the spiders with her two daggers.

"Watch where you're shooting that thing!" she protested.

"_Gomen nasai_!" I replied. I didn't notice her confused look; I was too busy trying to make Swiss cheese out of those spiders.

With the combined damage of my arrows, Isabela's blades, and Anders and Garrett's spells, the spiders were wiped out relatively quickly. As the last spider fell, I breathed a sigh of relief and put my weapon away, not even bothering to retrieve the arrows that were embedded in the spiders' carcasses. I can't stand to look at those things, even dead.

Suddenly, Garrett stormed up to me, looking at me like I was crazy. "Andraste's great flaming ass! What got into you just then, Amari?! You looked like some kind of psycho-killer!"  
I giggled sheepishly. "I, uh…really don't like bugs."

"I could tell, from the way you were screaming, 'die, bitches, die!'" Anders laughed.

"I'm SO happy you all can laugh about this," drawled Isabela, as she wiped off her daggers and sauntered up to us. "Those arrows of yours nearly turned my head into a quiver, kitten!" she cried.

I rubbed the back of my neck. "Sorry 'bout that, Izzy…"

Garrett sighed. "If you were that good EVERY time you fought, I wouldn't HAVE to worry about bringing you along on dangerous missions." He shook his head, putting away his bladed staff. "Anyway, we're wasting time. The Dalish camp is just up ahead."

Turns out, the Dalish were JUST as unfriendly as I expected them to be.

"Hold, Shemlen," quipped one of the elves that stood guard at the camp entrance. "Your kind are not welcome among the Dalish."

"What did you call me?" Garrett wondered.

"It means you are not one of the People, and should leave," the elf said impatiently.

"Who EXACTLY are the Dalish?" asked my foster sibling. Useless questions. C'mon, Garrett, let's get movin'…

"We are the last of the Elvhen," replied the elven woman standing next to the rude one.

"Keep that in mind, Gare," I said sarcastically. "Elves you see elsewhere? Figments of your imagination." The two elves simply rolled their eyes at me.

"They have given up their identities to live with the Shemlen," said the woman. "They are Elvhen no more."

Garrett raised his hands in surrender. "Yeah, okay. Anyway, I'm not expecting tea and cakes. I just need to see someone."

"There's nothing here for any human!" the elf man growled. _Ooooh, someone's hostile…then again, humans did enslave elves for centuries and stuff…_

"Wait." The woman tilted her head slightly, staring at Garrett. "This is the one the Keeper spoke of."

Her friend's eyes widened in surprise. "A Shemlen? I thought he'd be an elf."

They stepped aside. "Enter the camp. Keeper Marethari has been waiting for you," the woman said politely.

"Cause trouble and you'll meet our blades, stranger." The douche-elf glared at us as we passed. Turning around, I stuck out my tongue at the elven man's back.

"You're so childish," Anders chuckled. I felt my cheeks get warm. _Whoops…he wasn't supposed to see that. _"Oh, don't be embarrassed." He put a hand on my head. "It's cute." Did he just call…no, I must have misheard…

"Get a room, you two," Isabela snickered. I shot her a brief glare.

"Keeper Marethari?" Garrett approached an elderly, white-haired elven woman with a wooden staff on her back. Look, a mage. Heh, if those bastard Templars were smart enough to know that only mages used staves as weapons, they'd be much more successful in their mage-hunting. Fortunately, they're all about as sharp as basketball. "I was told to bring you this amulet." He held the necklace out to her.

"Andaran atish'an, travelers…"

Keeper Marethari then proceeded to tell us that we had to do something ELSE before Garrett's debt was fully repaid…big surprise there. To complete the task, we were to accompany the Keeper's First (in other words, her assistant/right-hand/heir) to the top of the mountain. There, we had to place the amulet on the altar that was supposedly built there, and her First would recite a Dalish rite for the departed…and then we had to bring her First with us when we left. Sounds simple. Right?

Nothing in Thedas is EVER that simple.

As we walked up the path that led up the mountain, we came across the Keeper's First. She was kneeling on the ground, and I caught a glimpse of a flash of light before she noticed we were there. The light went out instantly, and she stood up, dusting herself off and walking over to us. Another mage. What are the odds? She had short black hair, slanted green eyes, and facial tattoos that every Dalish elf seemed to have. Must be some kind of Dalish tradition…

"Oh. I didn't hear." The woman smiled brightly at us. "You must be the ones the Keeper told me about. Aneth ara." Then, her eyes widened. "I'm sorry! I didn't ask your name! Unless…" She frowned. "It's not rude to ask a human their name, is it?" She sighed. "I'm rambling, sorry…"

Anders and I glanced at each other, both of us with expressions mixed with incredulousness and amusement. She's a ditz. I can already tell. Anders was probably thinking the same thing.

"I like her," Isabela muttered to me. I rolled my eyes.

"You like anythin' with a pulse, Izzy," I teased.

Garrett shot us a look that clearly said 'shut up, you guys are stupid'. We fell silent, and Garrett turned back to the elf. "You'll have to work harder than that to offend me. My name's Hawke." Even HE calls himself by his last name. What, is "Garrett" not good enough for people?

"I'm Merrill. But, you probably knew that already." Did Marethari mention her name? I must not have been paying attention. "Anyway, your task is for Asha'bellanar. It's not wise to make her wait." Witch of the Wilds, Flemeth, Asha'bellanar…how many names does this old lady have, anyway?

Off we went. Up the mountain…well, we didn't get very far until something stopped us. Walking skeletons…joy of joys. They all had rusty, jagged weapons, and some of them still had rotting flesh and bits of hair still connected to their bodies. _Ew. Ew. Ew. _And they smelled horrible…nothing like the smell of dead darkspawn, but horrible nonetheless. I made sure to stay at a VERY safe distance while attacking these guys. One of the corpses came at me anyway, though, and I probably would have been injured again if Anders hadn't crushed it with one of his Stone Fist spells. He was my hero, once again. _I think I'm getting a little crush on my favorite healer…uh-oh. _

After they were all dead (again), Garrett stopped and asked Merrill some questions. _Hypocrite. _Who was the one who was urging us to pick up the pace earlier? And now, he's stopping us in our tracks to ask questions that don't even really matter? I mean, really. I wanna see if this rite will cause something interesting to happen.

We ended up fighting a few more groups of creatures on our way up the mountain, and through the cave that led to the top. It wasn't just corpses, either. There were a couple Shadow Warriors, an Arcane Horror, and even some Shades. Have you ever seen a Shade? They're demons, and they're kind of hard to describe…they were dark purple with a little black mixed in, they didn't have feet or visible mouths or noses, and they were all rather hunched over. So yeah, I fought my first demon on this venture…although I wouldn't have objected if I never met a demon at all. They're very creepy, and Garrett hasn't told me much about them. Maybe I'll ask him later. Or Anders…I'm sure they know plenty about them, since they're both mages. Speaking of mages, let's talk about Merrill. We stumbled across a quaint little barrier on our way up the mountain, and Merrill was kind enough to clear it away for us. Wanna know how she did it? Blood magic. She just slit open her wrist like it was no big deal and used the blood to clear the magical barrier. Yep, she's a blood mage. Isn't that just WONDERFUL?

Anyway.

We all stood before the altar, Isabela and I watching nervously (and I with a bit of curiosity as well) as Garrett placed the amulet on it. Then, Merrill began to chant in her native tongue, which was too confusing to be able to write down. As the rite came to an end, a bright yellow light flashed from the amulet, and as we closed our eyes to prevent ourselves from being temporarily blinded, I heard something land softly in front of us. Opening my eyes, I wasn't all that surprised to see the woman Garrett described in his tale of the Hawkes' escape from Lothering, standing before us, looking all too pleased with herself as she surveyed us with a wise gaze. With everything I've been through these past months, nothing really surprised me anymore.

"Ah, and here we are," the witch said with a satisfied sigh.

"Flemeth…" Garrett whispered, looking shocked.

"Andaran atish'an, Asha'bellanar," Merrill said, bowing respectfully.

Flemeth regarded her smugly. "One of the People, I see…so young and bright. Do you know who I am, beyond that title?"

"I know only a little," Merrill admitted.

"Then stand. The People bend their knee too quickly." Merrill quickly stood straight. Flemeth glanced at Garrett, a smile tugging at her lips. "So refreshing to see someone who keeps their end of a bargain," she drawled. "I half expected my amulet to end up in a merchant's pocket."

"Nobody would buy it," Garrett replied sarcastically. "Perhaps because it had a witch inside?"

"Just a piece," Flemeth said. "A small piece. But it was all I needed. A bit of security, should the inevitable occur…and if I know my Morrigan, it already has."

I glanced at Anders, wondering how he was taking this. I found him staring at Flemeth through narrowed, suspicious eyes. "What are you?" he asked warily. "A spirit? …An abomination? This is no magic I have ever seen."

She smirked. "And you would know of spirits and abominations." _I'm sensing some kind of implication there…_

Anders blinked rapidly. "I'm a mage. Of course I know of such things."

Her smirk widened. "Of course." Okay, that was definitely implying something. My suspicions rose when I saw a flash of guilt in Anders' eyes. "I am a fly in the ointment," she continued. "I am a whisper in the shadows. I am also an old, old woman. More than that, you need not know." Suddenly, her gaze turned to me. _Garrett was right, it does seem like she's staring right into my soul._ "And you, child…I was expecting you. How nice to see that you made it to Kirkwall in one piece…" Another implication. She knows something!

"You know somethin' 'bout how I got here, don'tcha?!" I demanded, taking a step forward. "Please, tell me!"

Flemeth tilted her head. "Why would you want to know such a thing?"

I threw my hands in the air. "So I can find a way to get home, obviously! I have a family, y'know, and friends, that are probably worried sick…"

"Do you? I rather think you're exaggerating a bit…you know as well as I that there aren't many people 'worried' about you," Flemeth said nonchalantly. I winced._ Ouch. I wish she wasn't right…wait, how would she know that?_ "And, if given the chance to go home…would you truly want to go?

"Of course I would," I retorted.

"I don't think you would."

"And how would you know?" I asked defensively.

"I know a great many things, my dear. I know that you have made many friends, and even a family here, that you would rather not leave. I know that you will have feelings for someone, but will be afraid to love again… I know that your role in the lives of the people around you is a much bigger role than you realize. I also know that you are not always…honest."

My blood ran cold. _Stop talking, stop talking… _"Nobody is always honest," I huffed.

"Some more so than others." The rest of the group were looking at me now. I think they suspect something…crap…

Luckily, Garrett chose not to ask. Instead, he looked at Flemeth. "You have plans, I take it?"

"Destiny awaits us both, dear boy. We have much to do. Before I go…a word of advice?" Flemeth turned around, walking towards the edge of the summit. "We stand upon the precipice of change. The world fears the inevitable plummet into the abyss. Watch for that moment," she whispered. "And when it comes, do not hesitate to leap." She turned around to face us again. "It is only when you fall, that you learn whether you can fly!"

"Cheap advice from a dragon," Garrett replied humorously.

"We all have our challenges," she said with a shrug. She looked at Merrill. "As for you, child: step carefully. No path is darker than when your eyes are shut."

Merrill nodded. "Ma serannas, Asha'bellanar."

"And as for you…" Flemeth turned her sharp gaze to me. "Do not be afraid of the things to come, and make your decisions carefully. What you do may very well change the course of fate. You and your foster brother are destined for greatness." I pursed my lips, not responding. "Now…the time has come for me to leave." She glanced from me, to Garrett, and back again. "You have my thanks…and my sympathy." _Well, THAT'S not ominous. _Flemeth walked towards the edge of the summit once again. A yellow light surrounded her, and before our eyes…she transformed into a dragon, and flew away. _Neat trick. _

"Well." Garrett took a deep breath. "That was odd, to say the least." He glanced at me. "Amari, why don't you go on home? We'll wrap things up here."

"Yeah, okay…"

"I'll go with her," Anders offered. "I could actually use her help at the clinic." He locked eyes with me, his clearly saying, _'we need to talk'_. Well. I suppose I can't avoid it. He walked over and put his hand on my back, leading me away.

*SCENE CHANGE*

"What was Flemeth talking about back there?" Anders demanded, as soon as we arrived at his clinic.

"Ya don't waste any time, do ya…" I muttered. Then, I blinked innocently at him. "I'd rather know what Flemeth meant when she was talkin' to you."

He flinched almost unnoticeably. "Don't change the subject, Amari," he sighed. "Please, just tell me."

I looked at him for a moment. "So, even the healer has a deep, dark secret?" My face was emotionless. "How am I supposed to trust you with anything, Anders, if you won't trust me?"

"I do trust you," he said immediately.

"Do you?" I tilted my head. "Remember when I told ya when I wanted to help ya fight for mages?" He nodded. "Ya haven't been lettin' me do anything to help at all. Why not? You don't think I truly wanna help? You think I'm some kinda Templar spy?"

Anders' brow furrowed. "Of course not." He looked away. "The stuff I do is very dangerous, Amari, and if I'm caught…I could get executed. I just…didn't want to put you at risk like that. I couldn't live with myself if something happened to you because of me."

My eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Really? That's…kinda sweet, actually." I felt myself begin to blush, but I forced it down. I gave a heavy sigh. "Fine, I s'pose I could tell ya my little secret. But, ya gotta promise me two things."

"What two things?"

"One: that ya won't call me crazy. And two: that'll you'll tell me that secret of yours someday."

Anders smiled slightly. "Deal."

"Alright, then." _Maybe Anders could even help me out. _"You know I'm not from around here, right?"

"Yes."

"And y'know how I have amnesia and all?"

"What of it? Are you remembering things now?"

"I, uh…I never had amnesia in the first place," I admitted sheepishly.

That caught him off-guard. "What?!" he cried. "Why would you lie about something like that?!" A look of disbelief shone in his eyes, and I knew right away what kind of thoughts were running through his mind.

"If you think I only said that so Garrett would take pity on me, you better fuckin' think again," I growled. "What kinda person do ya take me for?! I had a perfectly honest reason for tellin' him that! I don't lie to get things from people!"

"You're right, you're right, I'm sorry," Anders said hastily. "Please, continue." _Damn straight I'm gonna continue. Douche. _

"I told Garrett I didn't remember where I was from, or how I got here, because he would've thought I was insane if I told him the truth." I took a deep breath. "Okay, I'm just gonna come out and say it. I'm not…from Thedas. I'm from a different world."

Anders looked at me incredulously. "Right. And I've been having a secret affair with the Knight-Commander. What's the real reason?"

I threw my hands in the air. "See?! I knew you wouldn't believe me! Nobody will!" I sank to the floor, covering my face with my hands. "Nobody will help me find a way to get home. I'm stuck in this chaotic fantasy-land forever."

Anders didn't reply right away. I heard footsteps, and my heart sank. _He's walking away. Lovely. _Then I felt a hand on my head, and looked up to see Anders kneeling in front of me. He had such a gentle expression on his face, and I suddenly felt the urge to cry. "I'm sorry, Amari. I shouldn't acted like that, especially when you just opened up to me. Are you sure you're from another world?"

There was desperation—as well as tears—in my eyes. "Of course I'm sure," I snapped. "This world is so completely different from mine, it's unreal. Things that are everyday occurences here are only myths in my world."

"Then I'll take your word for it." Anders took my hand. "I can't stand to see you like this. Let me help you, Amari. I'll help you find a way to get home."

I sniffled, hope flaring in my chest. "Really?" I asked softly. "You believe me? You don't think I'm crazy?"

"Really. I can tell you aren't lying to me, so I believe you." Anders smiled. "We'll figure this mess out together. In the meantime, maybe you can tell me a bit about your world? And maybe I'll even let you help me with the Mage's Underground."

A bright smile slowly spread across my face. "Yeah!" I cried. "That sounds awesome! Arigatou! Arigatou!" I suddenly threw my arms around Anders, pretty much tackling him to the ground.

He chuckled, patting me on the back. "I'm going to assume that means thank you." Then, he paused, and I realized the position we were in.

I had my arms around Anders' neck, and we were both laying on the ground…with me on top. Our faces were way too close for comfort, our noses only centimeters apart. Our eyes met, and I saw something in his that I couldn't quite describe…but it made my heart race, so much that it was pounding in my ears. I couldn't move. His gaze kept me frozen in place, and I was all too aware of his hand resting on the small of my back. _Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy SHIT. _His eyes flickered to my lips, and I instantly snapped out of the spell I was under. Jumping up, I dusted myself off and turned my head away, hoping that he couldn't see how red my face was. I cleared my throat, and tried to act like that didn't shake me at all…which it did. Big time. "Well, um…" I looked around. "Thanks for, uh, listening. And everything. Yeah. I gotta go. There's this…this thing I'm late for. Very important thing, that. So I'll see you…later. Bye!" With that, I turned around and bolted out of Anders' clinic, leaving behind the bewildered—and frustratingly amused—healer.

As soon as I was a good distance away, I collapsed against a wall, breathing heavily to slow to my beating heart. That was…SO head-spinning. What the hell just happened?! And didn't I use that excuse on the DARKSPAWN? I facepalmed. He's turning me into a blubbering lunatic!

_But you loved it. The way he looked at you made you feel amazing._

Shut up, me! I can't help it if he's gorgeous, and kind, and generous, and…dear Lord.

I am in SO much trouble.

*THAT'S ALL FOLKS*

**Translations**

_Gomen nasai _= I'm very sorry

**A/N: It's me again! I'd like to thank everyone that's followed this story, and to my ever-loyal reviewer, Musicalrain! You guys are so great! ;7; Okay, I better go, before I start to bawl...later! 3**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: You know the drill, guys. I own nothing, besides Amari.**

Chapter Five: In Which I Give Kirkwall A Music Lesson.

"C'mon, Angel, just play one game!"

I pursed my lips, looking at Varric like he was stupid. "You're kiddin' me, right? I've seen how you and Izzy play Diamondback! I'm not lettin' you cheat me outta my money!"

"Oh, don't be so dramatic," Isabela said carelessly, slipping an arm around my shoulders. "You never know if you're good at something till you try it!"

I gave her a deadpan look as I removed her arm from my shoulders. "No way. Not happening. Find another rookie to rob."

Isabela smirked. "Oh, Merrill!" She turned and started taking advantage of the Dalish girl's naivety, making me sigh and turn away from her. _She's unbelievable. _

"I'm glad you have some sense," Anders chuckled from his seat across from me. "I was afraid Varric and Isabela were going to rob you blind."

I grinned, trying to ignore the butterflies in my stomach. "I know a set-up when I see one."

Anders, Isabela, Varric, Merrill, Carver, and I were all hanging out in the Hanged Man today. No job offers had come up lately, and things at Anders' clinic were going slow (for once), so we all decided to take a break. Isabela and Varric had just finished schooling Carver in a card game called Diamondback, and the boy was currently pouting in the seat next to me. Now, they were trying to suck poor Merrill into their little web of scams.

After I so gracefully bolted out of Anders' clinic the other day (notice the sarcasm there), I decided that I might as well come clean with everyone else, too. What's the use in keeping a secret like that, especially when everyone could potentially help me? So now, everyone knows about my alien-ness. Which was why I had my phone, mini-speakers, and camera laying on the table, and no one really questioned where they came from.

"So…" Carver frowned, staring at the devices in front of me. "What are those things used for, anyway? They don't look like they can do much."

I wiggled my index finger in my younger-foster-brother's face. "Not everything is what it seems, lil' bro," I said with a wide smile. I pointed to my camera. "This thing can capture a single moment in a picture—"

"With no paint or anything?" Anders wondered.

I laughed. "None at all. It can also capture videos…" I struggled to find the right words to explain what a video was. I pressed the power button on the top of my camera, glad that I was smart enough to turn it off the day after I arrived in Thedas. "Here, I'll just show you." As soon as it got to where it needed to be, I hit "record" and pointed the camera at them. "Okay guys, do something cool. I don't wanna waste this."

Anders rubbed the back of his head. "Um…" He held out his hand. Looked around to make sure nobody else was watching, and made a little ball of sparks. I grinned. This was an awesome thing to catch on video! "There." The ball flickered, and then went out.

Carver scoffed. "That wasn't THAT cool."

I raised an eyebrow. "I don't see YOU conjuring lightning-orbs outta thin air, kiddo."

My little brother huffed. "I'm only five years younger than you!"

"Yep. Therefore, you're five years too young to question me," I said with a decisive nod. He glared at me, and I laughed and patted his head. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding!" I flicked his nose. "Don't be so uptight, _otouto-chan_." I pressed stop on my camera.

They've gotten used to the way I accidentally lapse into random Japanese, so they use context clues to figure out what I'm saying, rather than asking me every single time. "Whatever. Just show us this 'video' nonsense," Carver mumbled.

"Gather 'round, gents." Carver leaned towards me, while Anders got up and walked around the table, standing behind me and leaning forward, looking over my shoulder. Holy crap he's so close—my insides are starting to melt—

…I need to stop being such a girl.

Taking a deep, discreet breath, I clicked on the video I just took and hit play. As the last few moments were played back to them from my little camera screen, their eyes grew as wide as saucers.

"Holy Maker!" Anders and Carver cried in unison.

"How is this even possible?!" Carver said, completely in awe.

"I thought you said you didn't have magic in your world," Anders said skeptically. I rolled my eyes good-naturedly.

"It's not MAGIC, dummy." I smiled widely. "It's technology."

Then, they immediately questioned me about my phone. So, I explained it to them, as well as the mini-speakers. My phone was dead, so I couldn't show them the wonderful things it could do.

"What's that, then?" Carver pointed at the guitar that was resting against my leg.

"It kind of looks like a lute," said Anders. I shrugged.

"It serves the same purpose, but it's a lot different." I picked it up and set it in my lap. "This is called an acoustic guitar." I stroked the smooth, light brown wood. "It's probably my prized possession."

"You have THOSE," Anders gestured to my other-worldly devices, "And yet, your prized possession is a simple INSTRUMENT?"

I pouted. "Oi, don't diss my baby." I hugged it to my chest, kissing the neck of it. "It's okay, sweetie, he didn't mean it." I gave him a disapproving look. "Anders, apologize."

The blonde mage shook his head, smiling at my ridiculousness. "The way you coddle that instrument reminds of Varric and his crossbow."

"Difference is, I didn't name my guitar," I pointed out. "Hey, ya want me to show ya what this lovely thing can do?"

"You play music?" asked Merrill. She and the other two were suddenly interested in our conversation.

I patted my guitar. "I sure do. Back in my world, I got paid to play music in a city bar." I looked around. "Like this one, only less…gross."

"Play us a song from your world, kitten!" Isabela said excitedly. Other people were starting to look over at us.

"Not so loud, Izzy," I hissed. "I'll play ya a song, just give me a minute." I stared up at the ceiling, thinking of a song I could play…

*SWITCH POV*

Anders watched curiously as Amari stared into space for a few moments. After the incident at his clinic a few days ago, he had noticed that she was beginning to act a little more…shy, whenever he got close to her. Maybe he had spooked her or something…well, it was for the best. If she ended up liking him…it wouldn't go down well. Not being the man he is.

Suddenly, she got up. "This damn tavern needs a stage," she muttered to herself, before climbing on top of an empty table. _What in the Maker's name is she doing?_ "Oi!" She yelled out, making all eyes turn to her. "Listen up, you drunks! I'm about to give y'all a glimpse of some REAL music!" Anders chuckled. He found her boldness to be quite amusing, and cute. This girl was far more different than any other girl in Thedas.

Then, she started using the little triangular thing in her left hand to strum the guitar. She pressed her other fingers against several of the strings towards the top of it, and it produced a series of notes that could never be made from a lute. But what amazed him the most…was her voice.

"I've been waitin' on the sunset, bills on my mindset,

I can't deny they're getting' high.

Higher than my income, incomes bread crumbs,

I've been tryin' to survive!

The glow that the sun gets right around sunset,

Helps me realize

That this is just a journey, drop your worries,

You are gonna turn out fine.

Oh, you'll turn out fine.

Fine, ohh, you'll turn out fine…

"But you gotta keep your head up, ohh!

And you can let your hair down, ehh!

You gotta keep your head up, ohh!

And you can let your hair down, ehh!

I know it's hard, oh it's hard to remember sometimes,

But you gotta keep your head up, ohh!

And you can let your hair down, ehh-eh-eh-eh!"

Every single person in the Hanged Man had their eyes on Amari now. Her instrument and her voice sparked fascination in them, and everyone watched with awed gazes as she continued…

"I've got my hands in my pockets,

Kickin' these rocks, it's kinda hard to watch this life go by.

I'm buyin' into skeptics, skeptics mess with

The confidence in my eyes!

I'm seein' all the angles, starts to get tangled,

I start to compromise

My life and my purpose, is it all worth it?

Am I gonna turn out fine?

Oh, you'll turn out fine.

Fine, ohh, you'll turn out fine…

"But you gotta keep your head up, ohh!

And you can let your hair down, ehh!

You gotta keep your head up, ohh!

And you can let your hair down, ehh!  
I know it's hard, oh it's hard to remember sometimes,

But you gotta keep your head up, ohh!

And you can let your hair down, ehh-eh-eh-eh!"

Anders stared at Amari in wonder. How could anyone makes such a beautiful sound? He had never heard anything like this before in his life. It was spectacular. _Just look at her up there. She looks so happy, like she belongs there, singing her heart out for all these people…she's even attracting more people into the tavern. They can't get enough of her. _He felt a slight surge of jealousy at that thought. _**Do not let her distract you**_**. **An all-too-familiar voice boomed in his mind. _I'm not, _he replied, _Besides, she's going to be helping us soon. _He looked up at her again. _Maker, she's beautiful…_ _**Do not become infatuated with this woman,**_the voice warned. He ignored it.

"Only rainbows after rain,

The sun will always come again.

And it's a circle, circlin' around again,

It comes around again.

I said, only rainbows after rain,

The sun will always come again!

And it's a circle, circlin' around again,

It comes around.

"But you gotta keep your head up, ohh!

And you can let your hair down, ehh!

You gotta keep your head up, ohh!

And you can let your hair down, ehh!

I know it's hard, oh it's hard to remember sometimes,

But you gotta keep your head up, ohh!

And you can let your hair down, ehh!"

The Hanged Man was packed now, and everyone was loving Amari's song. So much so, that they even sang along with the last part…

"Keep your head up! (ohhh)

And you can let your hair down. (ehhh)

Keep your head up! (ohhh)

And you can let your hair down. (ehhh)

Keep your head up! (ohhh)

And you can let your hair down. (ehhh)

I said, ohhhhh no-no-no-no-no-nooo."

Amari fell silent, and she stopped strumming the guitar in her arms. The entire tavern was quiet for a moment…until everyone burst into cheers and whistles, making the girl smile widely and rub the back of her head, an adorable blush spreading across her cheeks.

"That was amazing!" yelled one of the few women in the tavern.

"Way to go, lass!" cheered one of the men.

Amari giggled. "Thank ya, thank ya very much!" One of the other men moved to help her down from the table, but Anders pushed past him, getting to her before he had the chance to. The man glared at him as he took Amari by the waist, lifting her down with ease. _She's rather light…I hope she's eating enough. _

"Amari, you were incredible," Anders said in her ear. He saw her face get even redder.

"I…I'm so glad ya think so. Th-thank you," she stammered. He smiled at her.

"I'm not surprised you made a career out of this. I know I'd pay to hear you sing."

Amari turned her head away, but he could see her ears, and they were as red as a tomato. "I, uh…well…y-yeah. I'm happy to hear that. You're too kind."

"Hey, lady!" Corff, the bartender—and owner of the Hanged Man—pushed his way through the crowd of citizens in his tavern, walking up to Amari. "That music you just played was spectacular! This place hasn't been so busy since…well, ever!" He looked at her with a grin. "Why don't you come play that lute…thing of yours more often? I'll even pay ya for it!"

Amari's eyes widened. "Really? You'll pay me to play music here?"

"Just look at all these people! They love you!" Corff held out his hand. "So, whaddya say? Do we have a deal?"

She brightened, shaking his hand vigorously. "We have a deal!"

"Fantastic! I'll make the arrangements…what was your name again?"

She laughed. "Amari B—" She stopped herself, then slowly smiled. "Hawke. I'm Amari Hawke."

"I've got faith in you, Miss Hawke. Keep having performances like the one you just did, and we'll both be richer for it." With that, Corff walked away.

As soon as the bartender was out of sight, Amari let out a squeal. "I've got a job! Just like my job at home! Yay!"

"Sister!" Carver and the others walked up to Anders and Amari. Anders saw the dark-haired girl's eyes brighten when Carver called her his sister.

"Hey there, guys. What'd you think of that little slice of Earth music?" Amari asked proudly.

"That was breath-taking, Angel," Varric said with a wink.

"You were soooo good, Amari!" Merrill cried, giving her a big hug.

"Do that again," Isabela said with a grin.

Carver rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment. "…I'll admit, you're a pretty good singer. And that guitar-playing wasn't bad, either…" In response to his rare praise, Amari laughed loudly and jumped on his back, making the boy cry out in surprise and nearly fall over.

"That was a pretty impressive display, 'Mari."

The group turned around, hearing a familiar voice. Garrett was standing a couple feet away, with Fenris, Aveline, and a man they didn't know with him. "Garrett!" Amari abandoned her perch on Carver's back and ran into Garrett's arms. "I didn't know you were here," she said, her eyes shining.

"We came in around the time you started playing. This Earth of yours has some pretty interesting music," he said with a chuckle.

"I'm sorry," said the man next to Garrett. "But, what's this 'Earth' place you're speakin' of?"

Anders glanced at the newcomer. He had short, dark brown hair, bright blue eyes, and tan skin. He wore shiny white armor, and had a bow and quiver on his back. He spoke with an accent, so he knew the man wasn't from Kirkwall. The stranger eyed Amari with a curious gaze…but it lingered, and Anders didn't like that.

"I'll…explain that later," Garrett said. "Right now, let's do some introductions." He took the stranger by the arm and pushed him forward. "Guys, this is Sebastian Vael, from Starkhaven. Sebastian, this is Varric Tethras, Isabela, my little brother Carver, Merrill, Anders, and my little sister Amari." He finished by patting Amari on the head, who had let Hawke go so she could get a good look at Sebastian.

"You're the one who was playin' that fascinating music?" Sebastian stepped towards Amari, taking her hand and placing a light kiss upon her knuckles. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Lady Hawke."

Amari's eyebrows shot up, her face reddening. "L-Lady…?" She cleared her throat. "It's, uh…nice to meet you too, Vael_-san_…er, Mr. Vael."

"Please, it's just Sebastian." He lifted his head, flashing her a charming smile. "Y'know, I'm not surprised that you have such a lovely voice…it matches your looks perfectly—"

"Okay!" Anders and Garrett stepped between them, the former pulling her close to him protectively.

"Don't be getting handsy with my sister, Sebastian," Garrett warned.

"I'm sorry Hawke, I didn't mean to offend," said Sebastian, raising his hands in surrender.

"Yeah, yeah…" Garrett then proceeded to tell Sebastian about the boundaries regarding his sister.

"…A-Anders?"

The mage in question looked down at the girl in his arms, a bit pleased to see her entire face lit up red. She was gazing up at him with those beautiful multi-colored eyes of hers, he was finding it difficult not to get lost in them… _**She's distracting you! **_He once again ignored the deep, booming voice in his head. All he wanted was to just look at this other-worldly girl for a few moments longer…

Then, Garrett cleared his throat, making them jump apart. "Anders. Must I go through the rules with you as well?" The healer rubbed the back of his neck, feeling his cheeks get warmer with embarrassment.

"Oi!" Anders glanced at Amari, seeing her scowling at Garrett with a defiant look in her eyes. "I can take care of myself, thank ya very much!" She put her hands on her hips. "I'm not some Orlesian wallflower that needs coddled and protected every moment. I'm a grown-ass woman, and I'd like to be treated like one!" Her snappy tone made Anders smile. _There's that attitude I've come to like. This girl is really starting to grow on me._

As Amari and Garrett bickered back and forth (with everybody else standing awkwardly off to the side), Anders took the chance to observe the girl.

_I'd better be careful. If I'm not cautious, I may end up falling in love with her…and that wouldn't be good for either of us._

**Translations**

_Otouto _= little brother

_-chan_ = suffix used to show familiarity, usually for girls or little boys

_-san _= used to show respect, for strangers or people of a higher station; equivalent of Mr. or Mrs.


	6. Chapter 6

5

Chapter Six: In Which I Go Spelunking.

Ever since I got myself that job at the Hanged Man, money's been coming in a tad bit faster…and the faster, the better. Garrett has been taking on a lot more jobs than usual, and some of them were pretty darn important. Like that job with the Qunari, where he killed all these Tal-Vashoth for a dwarf named Javaris; only to find out he had made up the bargain he told Garrett about. He got paid, but Garrett still felt annoyed…well, at least Fenris (and his Qun-speaking-ness) made the Arishok (the Qunari leader) like him a bit more. Oh, and that business with the Templars. He had to go kill these blood mages that were putting demons inside some new recruits…nasty bit of business, but he got it done, and pretty much saved the Templar order…damn. And there was also that mess with that Chantry sister…Petrice, I think her name was. She asked Garrett to escort this Qunari mage she found out of the city…and stumbled right into a whole group of other Qunari. Turns out, the lady had left a trail to Garrett to make it look like he killed the mage's "leash-holder", and his other friends. He had to kill them, then the mage killed himself…I will never understand the Qunari. Ever. Anyway, she paid him—even after he confronted her about her trickery—but he'll never forget how she tried to have him killed.

And where was I while my brother was off adventuring? I was with Anders. And before you make any smart comments, we were doing some research. He found some books on the Fade (the place people here go when they dream, and where demons live), and was trying to find out if there were any other sightings of those strange cracks I described seeing before I got dropped here. So far, we've found nothing. It's rather depressing. But, Anders is sure we'll find something. He said stuff like that doesn't just HAPPEN.

…I'm not so sure that's true.

Oh yeah, and Sebastian offered to take over my training from Varric. He said it would be better for me to learn from someone who uses the same type of bow as me, and not a crossbow. He's a pretty good teacher, and he's super nice. Maybe that comes from being a Chantry brother…or from being a prince. Yep, Sebastian is the prince of Starkhaven. He told me that mercenaries murdered his entire family, and that Garrett was going to help him hunt them down. He's still pretty angry about that whole thing, but he says that the Chantry is helping him master himself. I'm glad he's happy and finding inner peace and all, but he talks about the Maker a LOT. And after Garrett told him of my little alien predicament, and that there is no Maker where I come from, he's been determined to get me to convert to his religion. Sorry, but I'll stick with my God, thank-you-very-much. Anders doesn't seem very happy that he's spending time with me at all, but he hasn't said much about it.

Anyway, the combined money from my job and Garrett's jobs started piling up…until he finally had enough to invest in that Deep Roads expedition.

*SCENE CHANGE*

"So, ya finally managed to gather up fifty sovereigns, eh?" I asked, smirking at Garrett from across the table in Gamlen's house.

"Yup," he said with a mouth full of food. "I'll be going to see Bartrand later on today—"

"Garrett, don't talk with your mouth full," Leandra scolded.

Garrett swallowed his food, smiling sheepishly at his mom. "Sorry, Mother."

"I don't see why this trip is so important," Gamlen muttered.

Carver rolled his eyes at him. "We're going to find treasure, so we can get lot of money and buy back the estate YOU gambled away." Our uncle grumbled in response.

"Anyway, Amari, I was kinda hoping you'd come with me," Garrett continued.

Everybody's attention snapped to Garrett.

"What?! You can't possibly be serious!" Leandra exclaimed.

"So, you'll bring the half-blind girl along, but you won't bring me?" Carver huffed.

"You'll get yourself killed," Gamlen scoffed.

They all started arguing with each other, with me sitting quietly in my seat. Then, when I decided I'd had enough, I jumped up, my chair clattering to the floor. "_URUSAI_!" I yelled. They fell into a shocked silence, staring at me with wide eyes, a gaze I responded to with a glare. "First of all—" I smacked Carver and Gamlen in the back of the head as hard as I could. "—I may be half-blind, but I'm NOT WEAK, and you'll do well to remember that!" The two men yelped and rubbed the spot where I slapped them. "Second of all, I'm pretty sure it's MY decision whether I go or not. I'm twenty-four years old, I can think for myself just fine." I sighed and picked my chair up, sitting down. "But, Garrett, I don't think I'd enjoy the Deep Roads. They're crawling with darkspawn, and you KNOW how I feel about those things."

"But we'll be going where there won't be that many darkspawn! C'mon, 'Mari, it'll be fun!" Garrett pleaded.

I gave him a deadpan look. "Traipsing through underground tunnels, with the constant threat of doom, and no sunlight for weeks on end? Sorry bro, but I think I'll pass."

"Thank the Maker," Leandra sighed.

Garrett ended up taking Carver, instead of me. Along with Varric, and Fenris. He wanted Anders to come, but his aversion to darkspawn was as strong as mine, so he stayed behind. The expedition set out for the Deep Roads later that evening, with Leandra begging Garrett to leave Carver at home. They assured her that he'd be fine…but I got a twisting feeling in my gut as I watched them leave. I know who I'd be praying for tonight…and I'm not even that big of a prayer.

*TIME SKIP*

It's been about two weeks since Garrett and Carver's expedition left, with no word from them. Not that I expected them to send word, being in dangerous underground tunnels and all, but a letter from them would have calmed my nerves a bit. The bad feeling I had when I watched them go was only getting stronger as time went on, and I was almost beside myself with worry.

"Amari?" Anders put his hand on my shoulder, making my stomach flip. "Are you alright? You seem troubled."

"Oh, it's nothin'," I replied with a small smile. "I'm just worried, is all."

"They'll be fine," Anders said reassuringly. "Hawke's with them, after all. He won't let any of them get hurt." _I love how he always seems to know what I'm thinking about._

"If you say so…" Then, my thoughts snapped back to what I was supposed to be doing. "Oh! I'm so sorry! I didn't help ya with those potions, did I?!"

Anders chuckled. "I already have them ready. You seemed deep in thought, so I didn't want to disturb you."

I facepalmed. "I'm your assistant, and I was too wrapped up in my own thoughts to even do my job."

"It's alright," Anders insisted. "There wasn't that many to make."

I sighed. "You're too nice, Anders. I won't zone out again, I promise."

He put a hand on my hand and slightly ruffled my hair. "You're a dedicated helper, it doesn't bother me if you zone out every once in a while."

"I'm not as dedicated as you are," I said with a half-smile. "You're so dedicated to what you do, ya lose sleep over it." I saw him stiffen, and my half-smile stretched into a grin. "What, ya didn't think I'd notice?" I poked his cheek. "Those dark circles under your eyes are pretty obvious." I put my hand on my hip. "I hope you aren't pullin' a bunch of all-nighters. If ya keep losin' sleep, you'll get sick." _Wouldn't that be ironic?_

Anders waved his hand dismissively. "I'm fine. You worry too much."

"I'd say I don't worry ENOUGH," I corrected. "You should take care of yourself more, man. These patients need a HEALTHY healer to take care of 'em, and you look like you're about to fall over from exhaustion. Maybe I should take over the clinic for a day, let you sleep some…" I said the last part almost as an afterthought.

He laughed. "It's kind of nice to have somebody fussing over me like this. I think the last time I was fussed over was when I was a kid…" He trailed off, his expression falling.

I quickly grabbed the object nearest to me…which turned out to be a big rock. "THINK FAST!" I yelled, before chucking it at him as hard as I could.

He grabbed the rock just before it hit him in the face. "What in Andraste's name was that for?!" he cried.

I looked down at the ground, shuffling my feet. "I was tryin' to cheer ya up…" I mumbled.

"By throwing a ROCK at my face?" he asked incredulously. I puffed out my cheeks.

"Oi, I just did the first thing that came to mind," I huffed. "Besides, it took your mind off it, eh?"

Anders shook his head and laughed. "Only you would try to lighten somebody's mood by throwing something at them." He gave me a warm smile. "You're a remarkable woman, Amari. Did you know that?"

I felt a sudden surge of confidence. "Well, I'm nothin' compared to you."

A smirk spread across his face, his eyes flashing in a way that made my knees feel weak. "I can hardly be compared to a beautiful, kind, strong woman from another world." My face got hot almost instantly.

"You think I'm beautiful, kind, and strong, do ya?" I asked with a grin.

"There's no need to repeat the obvious, I'm certain," Anders said flirtatiously. I was just about to open my mouth to respond with something witty, but Anders suddenly shook his head, frowning. _What I was about to say probably wasn't that witty, anyway. _"I'm sorry. That was awkward of me to say. I'm not making you uncomfortable, am I?"

"Uncomfortable?" I asked disbelievingly. "Darlin', you just made my day."

Anders chuckled, then sighed. "I can't do this. I won't allow you to tie yourself to me in such a way…"

_Well, that's a switch. _"First you start flirtin' with me, then you suddenly want nothin' to do with me?" I felt a pang in my chest, but I kept my tone light. "Talk about mixed signals."

"It's not that," Anders said, almost pleadingly. "I'm a dangerous man, Amari. If you fall for me, I'll only hurt you."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, for God's sake. How many times do I gotta say this? I'm a grown woman, I can take care of myself!"

"No."

I recoiled. _What the hell is that supposed to mean? _"Whaddya mean, 'no'?! I'm pretty fuckin' sure I can."

"Look, Amari, you probably shouldn't spend so much time with me. I know you want to help me, but…it would be best if you stayed away from me as much as possible. I'm a monster, and I don't want you to—"  
"I understand," I said, interrupting him.

He looked relieved. "You do?"

My face was emotionless. "Of course. You 'just want to be friends', 'cuz I ain't good enough for you." _How could I have been so stupid?_

Anders winced. "No, no, that's not what I—"

"Save it!" I snapped. "I've had just about enough of men like you! You just toss girls aside whenever you feel like it, without a single thought to how they would feel!" Daren's face flashed in my mind, for the first time since before I arrived in Thedas. "You make me sick." I turned around and sauntered towards the doors, scooping up my bow and quiver on the way.

"Amari, wait! Where are you going?!"

"Exploring," I hissed. "What's it to ya?"

"I know you're upset, but please, don't go outside Kirkwall…"

"I'll go wherever I damn well please!" I growled. "I DARE you to try and stop me!" I glared at him ferociously with tears in my eyes, catching him off-guard and making him stumble back, momentarily confused. "That's what I thought. And don't even think of comin' after me, or I swear, I will personally gut you." With that last scathing remark, I stormed out of the clinic.

*POOF*

_Men are so stupid!_

I kicked a rock into the water. My expression was contorted in anger…I was positively livid.

I was standing near the Amaranthine Ocean, in the Wounded Coast. Partly to get away from the hustle-bustle of the city, and partly to spite Anders. Like hell I would listen to him, especially after he just blew me off.

"I have no luck when it comes to love," I muttered to myself, twirling a twig between my fingers. I absentmindedly snapped it into little pieces, while a million thoughts raced through my mind. "I didn't even have a crush on the guy, and he just…" I stopped myself. _Do I have a crush on Anders?_ Maybe a small one…this wouldn't hurt very much if I didn't. Ha. Isn't that great?

I let out a loud growl and stormed away from my coastal spot, deciding instead to climb a small peak not far from me. I stood at the top, glaring down at the ground below me. Then, I looked up at the sky.

"_Anata wa shiawase, uchudesu ka?! Anata wa watashi o keiyu shite oka rete iru subete no tawagoto ni manzoku shite iru, matawa anata wa watashi ni nanika hoka no mono o nagetaidesu ka?! Sa! Anata no saiko no shotto de watashi ni hitto_!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. After my mini Japanese rant, I picked up a large rock and chucked it into the air. I watched the rock fall, and saw it delve into a cave that I hadn't noticed before. _Looks like an interesting little cavern…I wonder if Anders would approve of me going inside? I doubt he would. Well, since he doesn't want me around anyway…_ A smirk stretched across my face. _I'm gonna check it out._

So, I clambered down from my little peak and trudged through the rock and grass, over to where I spotted the cave. And sure enough, there it was. It was kinda small, but big enough for me to walk in with a good amount of room left. I took out my bow, notching an arrow, just in case there was something…unsavory in there.

"Uh…hello? Anyone live here?" I called, making sure I hadn't accidentally stumbled upon a hermit's home. When I received no response, human or otherwise, I walked on. Luckily, there were holes in the ceiling of the cave that allowed light to stream through.

It was a pretty cool place, if not damp. There were blue and pink crystals growing in various places, along with different species of plants, and there were pools of water scattered here and there. I chipped a few crystals off the walls and put them in my pack. What can I say? I like shiny things.

I heard something that sounded like footsteps behind me, and I whirled around. Alas, I was still alone in the cave. But the air changed. It seemed…stuffier. Shadows flashed in the corners of my eyes, and I felt myself break into a cold sweat. "I'm warnin' ya…" I said shakily, "I've got a loaded bow here, and I know how to use it!"

"**Don't be afraid, Amari Benett**."

A deep, booming voice made me jump. I couldn't pinpoint its location, it sounded like it was coming from everywhere.

"**I've been expecting you**."

Translations

_Urusai_ = shut up

_Anata wa shiawase, uchudesu ka?! Anata wa watashi o keiyu shite oka rete iru subete no tawagoto ni manzoku shite iru, matawa anata wa watashi ni nanika hoka no mono o nagetaidesu ka?! Sa! Anata no saiko no shotto de watashi ni hitto_! = Are you happy. Universe?! Are you satisfied with all the shit you've put me through, or would you like to throw something else at me?! Come on! Hit me with your best shot!


	7. Chapter 7

47

Chapter Seven: In Which I Make A Life-Changing Decision.

"What do ya mean, you've been 'waiting for me'?" I demanded from the disembodied voice. "Oi! Show yourself!" I wildly looked around the cavern, searching for the source of the voice. I feel like I'm in some kind of fucked-up, fantasy horror movie. Any moment now, that person'll jump out and stab me in the throat. That's how this always ends.

The mysterious person chuckled. "There's no need to fear, dear girl, I'm not going to kill you." The voice was no longer booming, and I saw a figure step out of the shadows. It was covered in a long, black hooded cloak, so I couldn't see their face, but judging by the deepness of their voice, I'm just going to assume that this person is a dude.

"What's with all the cloak-and-dagger?" I asked mockingly. "Too afraid to show your face?"

"Only to others, my dear. Not to you." He reached up and pulled the hood down from over his head. He was indeed male, and he wasn't that bad-looking either, although he was probably a lot older than me. His eyes were two different colors, just like mine, but I could tell it wasn't from half-blindness. His right eye was blue, and his left eye was a bright orange. He had short-ish black hair, a little soul patch under his bottom lip, and he had several scars on his face. One ran over his right eye, and another ran across his nose, while the last one ran from his left temple to the middle of his jaw.

"What happened to you?" I asked. "Didja get in a catfight? Have a falling-out with a tiger?"

The man laughed. "You have a clever tongue, girl! I like you. You'll be perfect."

I looked at him like he was a crazy person. "Perfect? Perfect for what?"

He didn't answer my question right away. "If the information I was given is correct…you are blind in your left eye, are you not?"

"Okay, I'm getting a little freaked out here," I said cautiously. "How the hell do ya know so much about me? I'm pretty sure I'd remember you if we'd met before."

"We haven't met," the man said. "Which reminds me…" He took a deep bow. "Lokir, at your service, milady." He straightened. "Now, regarding your…limited sight… If given the opportunity, you would want to restore your vision, wouldn't you?" I gave him an "are-you-stupid" look, and he chuckled. "Of course you would. What would you say if I told you that I have a way for you to do just that?"  
"If this is the Thedas version of the van, the rapist, and the candy…" I folded my arms across my chest. "I'm not buying it."

My reply took Lokir by surprise. "What…no. Maker, you are a strange one." He shook his head. "I have constructed a formula that can not only cure your blindness, but it will make you stronger than you are now. Would you like that, Amari?"

"Okay, I believe this is the part where I back away slowly…" I said, taking a slow step backward.

Lokir raised his hands in a gesture of surrender. "Do not worry; I am not going to force anything on you. Take my offer or don't…that is your choice." He sauntered towards the cave's exit, but stopped when he was beside me. A smirk stretching across his face, he leaned toward me and said softly in my ear, "But you will take it. Your curiosity…your desire for power will pull you to it." He straightened. "When you change your mind, I will be waiting for you here. Safe travels, my dear~" With that, he walked confidently out of the cave.

"What a creep…" I mumbled to myself, after Lokir was no longer in my sight. "Whatevs, I won't let the potential rapist get in my head." I turned to a wall and chipped off a few more crystals, stuffed them into my pack, then left the cave, heading back to good ol' Kirkwall.

*IN THE HANGED MAN*

_Well, looks like it's back to the ol' grind. _I walked into my favorite tavern in all of Thedas, picking up my guitar from the inside of the bar counter, where Corff was standing.

"Amari. On time as always," the bartender greeted. I winked at him.

"I'd never think of disappointing my boss," I said sweetly.

"Amari!" Anders' voice made my nose twitch. I wiped any expression off my face and turned around, to find the mage rushing up to me. "There you are! Where did you run off to? I was searching all over Kirkwall for you!"

I looked at him coldly. "I was exploring the Wounded Coast. Why?"

Anders sighed. "I thought I told you to stay in Kirkwall! The Wounded Coast is much more dangerous when you're on your own!"

"Oh, come off it, you douche!" I snapped. He blinked in surprise. "Stop acting like you care, and stop acting like what I do is any of your business. It'll save us both a lot of trouble."

"What you do IS my business," Anders insisted. "Your my assistant, of course I care about your safety!"

I tilted my head, looking at him innocently. "Oh, so if I wasn't your assistant, you wouldn't give a rat's ass what happened to me, right?"

He grimaced. "That came out wrong—"

"I'm nothing but an extra pair of hands to you!" I growled. "Well, you don't have to waste your time worrying about me anymore. I think my time as your assistant is done. I'll find a way to help the mages on my own. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got a job to do." I pushed past him onto the little stage Corff had built for me, leaving Anders dumbstruck and speechless. "Hey there, all you lovely Kirkwallians," I called, putting a bright grin on my face as the tavern's patrons eagerly turned to me. "It's me again! You ready for some music?"

"Yeah!" the crowd cheered, raising their mugs.

"That's what I like to hear!" I positioned my fingers on my guitar. "This song's for all you girls who are about to make the mistake of loving some dumbass guy!" I ignored Anders as he tried to catch my gaze, choosing instead to start the song.

"Hey good girl,

With your head in the clouds,

I bet you I can tell you what you're thinkin' about.

You'll see a good boy,

Gonna give you the world,

But he's gonna leave you cryin' with your heart in the dirt.

"His lips are drippin' honey

But he'll sting you like a bee!

So lock up all your love and go and throw away the key.

Hey good girl,

Get out while you can.

I know you think you've got a good man…

"Why, why you gotta be so blind?

Won't you open up your eyes?

It's just a matter of time, till you find…

He's no good, girl, no good for you.

You better get to gettin' on your goodbye shoes and go, go, go…

Better listen to me, he's low, low, low…

"Hey good girl.

You got a heart of gold!

You want a white weddin' and a hand you can hold!

Just like you should, girl.

Like every good girl does.

Want a fairytale endin', somebody to love.

"But he's really good at lyin'!

Yeah, he'll leave you in the dust.

'Cause when he says forever, well, it don't mean much.

Hey good girl,

So good for him,

Better back away, honey, you don't know where he's been!"

"Why, why you gotta be so—"

"Amari!'

The sound of my name made me stop. Frowning, I peered into the crowd…only to see Garrett pushing his way towards me. My eyes widened. "Garrett!"

The crowd began to boo loudly, glaring at Garrett, angry at him for interrupting the song. "Quiet, you drunkards! I'll keep singing after I speak with my brother!" I snapped, setting my guitar down and hopping off the stage. The reply I got was a few grumbles as the crowd went back to drinking.

I ran into Garrett's outstretched arms, hugging him tightly. "You're back! I'm so happy to see you, Big Brother!" I cried.

Garret hugged me back just as tightly. "It's so good to finally see my little sister again. I've missed you, 'Mari."

I let him go, looking around the tavern excitedly. "Where's Carver? Did he come to see me too? Man, I can't wait to hear about all the stuff you did in the Deep Roads! I bet Carver was awesome, showing you guys what he could do!" I tilted my head, staring at Garrett when he remained silent. His gaze was fixed on the floor, and he…almost looked on the verge of tears. "Gare…? What's wrong?"

"Carver…didn't come back with me," Garrett murmured.

I frowned. "Oh. Well, where is he? I wanna go see the little brat."

Garrett swallowed hard, expression turning pained. "You can't see him anymore. Our little brother, he…he didn't make it."

"What…?" I took a step back, eyes widening in horror. "You mean…he's dead?"

"It was the blight," Garrett explained. "He was killed by the taint."

My expression twisted with rage. "Why didn't you save him?! Grey Wardens are always in the Deep Roads, right? Why didn't you try to find them?!"

"Amari, I—"

"You were supposed to protect him! You let our little brother die!" I screamed, taking a step toward him with tears falling down my cheeks.

"I did the best I could!" Garrett yelled, tears falling from his eyes as well. "You think I wanted to see my brother die?! It was like Bethany all over again!" He took a deep breath. "Even if there were Grey Wardens down there, we wouldn't have found them in time. I protected him the best I could!"

I sniffled, glaring at my feet. "It wasn't enough," I grumbled. My mother's face flashed in my mind. _The best we can do…is never enough. _"I'm leaving," I said suddenly. Not even waiting for a response from, Garrett, I marched to the door.

"Amari, where do you think you're going? You've got a song to finish!" Corff yelled from behind the bar.

"Fuck off, Corff! I'm going for a walk, go ahead and deduct my pay if that'll satisfy ya!" I growled back, storming outside and slamming the door on the way out.

*IN THE WOUNDED COAST*

And then, I suddenly found myself in the Wounded Coast, staring at the opening of the cave where I encountered Lokir. Crazy thoughts were racing through my scrambled mind.

_What if Lokir isn't lying? What if he can cure my blindness? What if he really can make me stronger? If I'm stronger, maybe I can protect my loved ones better. Maybe I can stop them from dying all around me. Maybe I should accept his offer…_

_ What have I got to lose?_

My legs started moving of their own accord, my mind foggy with grief. I wandered into the cave, instinctively navigating through until I found the exact spot where we first met.

"Amari Benett…" I turned to see Lokir emerge from the shadows again. "Well now, you came back quicker than I expected. Have you reconsidered my offer?"

"I have." I was barely aware of my own reply. "….I accept."

A dark smirk slowly stretched across the dark-haired man's face. "That is music to my ears, dear girl. Come here…I'll administer the formula immediately." In my haze, I didn't even think to question his dark smirk or the sly tone of his voice. Only one thing was on my mind: become stronger…fast. So, I slowly walked up to him, stopping just a few inches in front of him. "Hold out your arm." I held my arm straight out. Then, Lokir pulled something out of a small sack. It was a container. Opening the lid, he pulled out…was that a syringe? Do they even have those here? Anyway, he tossed the container carelessly to the floor. Normally, I would have made some smart-ass comment about littering, but I wasn't exactly in a normal state of mind. I hardly even felt it when he stuck the needle into my arm, injecting whatever that glowing purple stuff was into my bloodstream. …Okay, the fact that the stuff was GLOWING should have put up some red flags. But there was no turning back now…

Just as Lokir finished the injection, a wave of pain washed over me, making me cry out and fall to the floor. The agony pulsed, as though it was in tune to MY pulse. And with every wave, the pain grew, until my cries turned into screams.

"Ha ha! Yes! It's working!" I heard Lokir yell triumphantly. "All my research, all my experiments, all my hard work…it's paying off!"

My vision blurred. From my position on the ground, I saw bright purple flames rising from underneath me. I looked at my arms, only to find them covered in flames as well. _Why aren't I getting burned…? _

"AMARI!"

Another voice shouted from my right. _Anders…? _

"You bastard! What did you DO to her?!" he growled.

_I can't feel the pain anymore_.

"I made history! You could never understand!" I heard Lokir reply.

"**You will never touch this girl again.**"

Anders' voice suddenly became much deeper, and it boomed around me. There was a flash of bright blue, and Lokir fell silent.

_Why is it so hard to see? I feel like my mind is slipping away…_

"Amari?" I could hardly feel Anders' arms around me as he lifted me onto his lap. "Amari, can you hear me? Stay awake, darling. I'll heal you, just look at me…" He breathed in sharply. "Maker preserve us…what happened to your eye?"

_What's he saying? I can't hear very well, either._

"What did that psycho do to you…?" Anders said softly. "Don't worry, I'll help you. I'll get you somewhere safe, and…"

_I'm so sleepy…Anders wouldn't mind if I napped on his lap for a while, would he?_

"Oh no. Don't close your eyes! C'mon, Amari, stay with me…"

_**That's it, mortal. Don't listen to that silly man. Close your eyes, sleep well…and be born anew.**_

_ Well, if you say so…_

"Shit! Amari, look at me! Dammit—"

_Can't hear you. I'm just gonna listen to that other voice in my head and go to sleep for a while… Not sure where that voice came from, but that's okay…goodnight…_

"Amari!"


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer****: Bioware owns everything except the characters I create.**

Chapter Eight: In Which I Forgive and Forget. But That's the Least of My Problems...

_Ouch…fuck, my head hurts…_

As I slowly began to regain consciousness, the throbbing in my skull grew stronger, and I curled up in a tight ball, holding my head. "Ugh…"

_**It's about time you woke up.**_

A strange voice spoke to me in my mind, startling me and causing me to jump. "Who the hell…?"

_**What, you don't remember me? I spoke to you a couple nights ago, silly mortal.**_

_Mortal…? _I struggled to recall the last thing I could remember before now. "Wait…so that other voice in my head was..."

_**Me. Correct. **_

"Who are you?" I asked, trying my best to sound demanding even in my weakened state.

_**The reason you have your sight back.**_

My eyes snapped open. I couldn't see anything under the blanket that covered me…but could it be… I threw the blanket off of my head, wincing when the light from the room hurt my eyes. "Holy shit on a fucking sandwich," I said softly.

For the first time in my entire life, I could see out of my left eye.

_So Lokir wasn't lying…_ I frowned. "Why are you in my head?" I asked the voice.

_**Remember that strange liquid that was injected into your blood? That was me…well, the essence of me. I am a hybrid creature, a mixture of Desire and Pride…you may call me Envy. **_

"Wait just a goddamn minute!" I cried. "Are you telling me that you're a DEMON? I have a fucking DEMON in my HEAD?!"

_**Of course not, **_Envy replied. _**I was injected into your bloodstream. My essence mixed with yours…I am part of you now.**_

"You have got to be kidding me…" I sat up, putting my head in my hands. "Just one fucked-up situation after the other, huh…"

_**Why are you upset? **_Envy wondered. _**Your sight has been restored.**_

"I'm an abomination now, you dolt!" I snapped. "I'd rather be half-blind than be possessed by some kinda freak demon!"

_**You are not possessed, per se…**_ Envy paused. _**I am inside your body, yes, but your mind is still your own, is it not?**_

"Yeah…but could you still take control if you wanted to?"

_**Perhaps. But I do not wish to, at the moment…observing the actions of people like you amuse me. I am content with that for now.**_

"Whaddya mean, 'people like me'?" I huffed.

_**Rash, short-tempered people,**_ Envy said. _**People who don't "look before they leap". That is what got you into this situation, am I wrong?**_

"Clarify," I said, my eyes narrowing slowly.

_**The mortal who killed Lokir and brought you here…Anders, I believe…you were upset with him after he pushed you away. You jumped to conclusions, thinking that he bluntly rejected you and no longer cared for you, and refused to believe otherwise. But what you failed to realize was that your previous relationship changed you. It warped your opinion of men, making you believe that they are all selfish, heartless creatures, and your fear of rejection made you snap at the thought of Anders pushing you away. **_

I blinked slowly several times. "How…could you possibly know that?"

_**I am part of you,**_ Envy repeated. _**I know things about you that you don't even know yourself.**_

Damn. I rubbed the back of my head. Maybe the demon-bitch was right…I mean, it made sense. Looking back, I really did act like a drama queen. I blew shit way out of proportion… "I need to find Anders," I said. "And apologize…"

_**He's been waiting outside your room since he brought you here.**_

"Right." I threw the blanket to the floor, the pain in my head fading as I got to my feet. I didn't even notice when my hip hit a table, my mind solely focused on finding Anders. I slammed the door open, looking from side to side until I spotted the mage sitting in a chair beside the door. He was staring at me with wide eyes, my sudden appearance obviously startling him.

"Amari, you're…"

I didn't give him time to finish. Grabbing his arm, I pulled the man to his feet and threw my arms around his torso, wrapping him in a tight hug. "I'm sorry!" I cried.

"What in the world...?" Anders looked down at me, his eyebrows raised in shock.

"I was such a bitch to you," I continued. "It was completely uncalled for, and I'm so sorry. I was scared, and I wasn't even really mad at YOU…I was mad at my ex, and…"

"Amari, slow down." Anders pulled away from me, grabbing my shoulders and looking down at me with that warm smile I loved so much. "It's okay. I understand." I released a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding, my shoulders slumping with relief. Then, Anders frowned. "What happened in that cave, Amari? What did that man do to your eye?"

"Oh…thanks for savin' me, by the way," I said. "I owe ya one." I pursed my lips, my gaze flickering down towards the ground. "Now, about that…" I blinked. "Wait. What do you mean, 'what did he do to your eye'?" Anders' brow furrowed, and taking me by the arm, he led me to a wall-mounted mirror.

"Well, fuck me sideways," I said, staring at my reflection with wide eyes.

My once-white eye wasn't white anymore. Instead, it was a bright purple, and I could see my pupil…but instead of it being circular, like all human pupils, it was a long vertical slit, giving it the look of a cat's eye, or a snake's. My jaw dropped, and my canines glinted in the light… _Oh my God, I have fangs!_ "Son of a bitch!" I cursed, lightly kicking the wall.

"Do you know what he did to you?" Anders asked again, staring down at me with intense curiosity.

"Kinda…" I turned around to face Anders, rubbing the back of my neck and avoiding eye contact. "So, uh…you're a mage, so I'm sure you know all about abominations, right?"

I caught a glimpse of guilt in Anders' eyes. _Oh? _"Yes, I suppose I do. Why?"

I bit my bottom lip, careful not to pierce myself with my new fangs. "I…hmm…damn, this is harder than I thought…" I took a deep breath. "That man, Lokir…he kinda turned me into one."

"WHAT?!" Anders roared, his expression twisting into one of horror.

I grimaced. "Would you keep it down?!" I hissed. "Do you want the whole damn house to hear you?!" I huffed. "I'm still ME. I just…have this hybrid demon named Envy in my head now."

"This is insane." Anders sat down in his chair. "He…fused you with a demon named Envy? He created a new demon?"

"Out of Pride and Desire, or so she says," I added.

"I can't believe someone would be cruel enough to force that on another human being…" Anders muttered. I turned my head away.

"It…it wasn't exactly forced," I said sheepishly.

He looked up at me sharply. "You VOLUNTEERED for it?!"

"Wouldja just shut up and hear me out?!" I snapped. "Lokir approached me when I was in that cave, and he told me that he had something that could cure my blindness and make me stronger." I shuffled my feet. "After I learned about Carver…I wanted to be able to protect the ones I love…so that never happened again. I wasn't thinking straight, and I accepted his offer…" I waved my hands wildly. "I didn't know what he was going to do! If I did, I never would have agreed to it! I'd much rather be a half-blind human than a strong abomination!"

Anders sighed, rubbing his temples. "I believe you…" He got to his feet again. "Well, at least I'm not alone anymore…not that that's necessarily a good thing…" he mumbled.

I raised an eyebrow. "Say what?"

He blinked in surprise. "You don't remember my outburst back in the cave?"

My brow furrowed. I thought back to when Anders arrived at the cave…the flash of blue, the ethereal voice… "You're possessed too?!" I cried.

Anders smiled slightly at my reaction. "I suppose you were bound to find out eventually. A year ago, I met a spirit of justice that was trapped outside the Fade. We became friends…he recognized the injustice mages in Thedas face every day, and he wanted to help." His smile faded. "I figured a willing host, a friend…had to be better than playing the demon and haunting some corpse."

"So you…fused?" I guessed. Anders nodded. "I see…hey, at least I don't have to try and cope with this alone, right?" I gave him a cheeky grin. "I've got you to help me out."

Anders chuckled. "That you do. We'll try to figure this out together."

I smiled brightly. "Sounds like a plan."

"Anders, what's going on up here?" I heard footsteps on the stairs, and Garrett emerged from the staircase. "I thought I heard…" When he saw me, he stopped. "Amari!" Before I could reply, he attacked me with a giant bear hug.

"Gare," I wheezed. "I kinda…need air to live!"

Garrett dropped me to the ground, making me gasp for breath. "You're awake!" he cried. "You've been unconscious for two days, I was starting to fear the worst…"

"Aw, you know you can't keep me down for long," I laughed. Then, I paused, his words sinking in.

"Two days?!"

**A/N:**** Don't forget to review! :3 Oh, and if any of you are Mass Effect fans as well, check out my other stories! ^-^**


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